Unplanned Life
by Jayne Leigh
Summary: Mary is left stunned when a woman turns up in Albuquerque claiming to be Marshall's ex-wife. As she struggles to come to terms with not knowing her best friend as well as she thought she did, Marshall struggles with feelings and bad memories that he thought he buried along time ago.
1. Chapter 1

**Okay, I was holding back this story until I finished some of my others but after completely 'Home Sweet…Mess' I couldn't resist posting this. I hope you like it! **

**Enjoy! **

**Unplanned Life**

**Prequel **

**1993 **

Marshall Mann knew that after sitting on the wet grass for almost an hour would probably stain his jeans but he didn't care. He didn't care that the sun was slowly disappearing and that the air was getting cold. He didn't care that he didn't have a jacket or anything to protect him from the storm that was forecast. He didn't even care that at his loneliest point, he was alone. He didn't care that he was a grown man, sitting in a graveyard at night during the winter in nothing but jeans and a t-shirt with tears running his down his face.

He reached out a traced the lettering on the headstone for what seemed like the billionth time, since it was place there almost a year ago. He didn't know why he did it every time he came here but it somehow made him feel closer to her; as if feeling her name would help him remember her.

Emily Anne Mann.

He always called her Emmy… Just him, no one else.

His hand then moved downwards; rearrange the flowers and ornaments placed there. There was more than normal today, since it was the anniversary of the day they lost her, friends and family had been stopping to pay their respect.

All the flowers were a mixture of bright colors. He wondered whether it was made the person buying them feel happier.

All the ornaments were of toys; a pale pink ceramic teddy bear, a 'my little pony' and a Barbie doll, sat propped up against the stone. A plastic windmill, stuck in the grass. What was the point of buying toys for someone who couldn't play with them?

He took a deep, shaky breath and closed his eyes, swallowing the lump in his throat. Just three years old and her life was cut short by some lowlife that decided to drive home even though he was three times over the alcohol limit.

Marshall hadn't even been there when he happened…He had got a phone call at his weekend job, waiting tables and rushed to the hospital only to be told he was too late…She was already gone…She had died at the scene and would not have suffered. Had he not been too shocked, too broken hearted, he may have questioned how they knew that for sure.

He had been 19 years old when she was born…Barely an adult himself but now at the age of 23, he had buried his child and was on the way to getting divorced…He felt old before his time.

Growing up, he had planned to travel after college before following the family tradition and joining the Marshal Service. That all changed when he met Tia Wytte during his first week at Michigan State University.

He had grown up in Phoenix and was close with his family. Being the youngest, his mother doted on him and he idolized his father. His two older brothers took care of him and the three of them had always gotten on well together. He had surprised everyone when he decided to move away for college but he felt he needed to get out from under the shadow of his family. He needed to find himself and it was perfect chance to do so.

Tia had been in two of his classes and they ended sitting together in both. From that moment, they become inseparable; they fell in love hard and fast. After six months of being together, Tia found out she was pregnant. Marshall had been shocked at first, unable to believe how careless they had been and realized that his life was about to change; that he wouldn't be able to live his life has he planned. Despite his fears, it never crossed his mind to abandon the mother of his child and when she told him she was going to keep the baby, he was determined to stand by her.

He knew he loved her and even in the short time they had been together, envisioned a future of marriage and children, although he never pictured it so soon.

His parents were devastated to hear the news, telling him to transfer to the University of Phoenix and forget all about Tia Wytte. He refused, telling them he was staying with the woman he loved and his child. His relationship with them was never the same after that. His father refused to talk to him and his mother had cried a lot. He spoke with his brothers but it was difficult since lived so far away and they spent most of their time trying to convince him to reach out to their parents.

Tia grew up in Michigan, so her family was close by. Her father had died when she was nine years old, so for a long time it had just been Tia, her mother Anne, her sister Jo-Anne and her brother Lewis. Marshall had got on well with Anne; she treated him like one of her kids and with his family so far away, he welcomed it. Lewis was a few years younger than Tia and was glad to finally have another guy around but Jo did not approve of their relationship. Then as soon as she found out Tia was pregnant, her disapproval turned to hate. Marshall shrugged it off, telling Tia that her big sister was just looking out for her and that they would prove her and his family wrong by staying together.

Anne had been disappointed that her daughter was going to be a teenage mom but vowed to support them both; pleased that Marshall was owning up to his responsibilities.

Tia was two months pregnant when they decided to elope with two of their best friends, Luke and Becky to witness it. Anne was upset that they ran off in secret to do it but eventfully came around and Jo was furious, telling Tia that Marshall was filling her head with unachievable dreams.

Marshall had written to his parents, telling them about the marriage but he never heard back from them. He didn't try to contact them again until after Emily had been born. Writing to them again, this time including a photograph of their first Grandchild. The only reply he got was off his brothers, Tom and Michael who sent gifts for their new niece.

It had been hard at first, getting used to being married and having a newborn but somehow they made it work. They had a small two bedroom apartment about 10 minutes from the University and they managed to juggle their schedules so neither of them had to drop out. Marshall worked the night shifts at a local bar three nights a week and at an Italian restaurant on the weekends, while Tia stayed with Emily.

When the accident happened, they both were coming up to graduating and Marshall already had a job lined up with a security firm; it wasn't a career in the marshal service but it meant he could stay close to his girls and the hours meant he could spend more time with them. Everything had been going so well for the little family and then their world was turned upside down.

At first Marshall and Tia clung to each other for support. They relied on Anne to organize the funeral and she had been grateful for something to do. Marshall could barely remember anything about the service. He knew he never left Tia side, not for one minute and he also knew his parents didn't show up. Over the three years he had got used to the idea of them not talking to him but that day, the day he was saying goodbye to his little girl, he needed them more than ever. No matter how much he loved Tia or how close he had grown to Anne, he needed his Mom and Dad. He didn't think he could hurt anymore but he did.

The first six months after losing Emily was the hardest period of Marshall's life. At first, he had not wanted to leave the house or go to work and Tia felt the same way but after a few weeks, when bills kept coming and their graduation looming, they had no choice. Slowly, they carried on with their lives but then arguments started and they struggled to get their marriage back on track.

Five months ago, Tia moved back home with her Mom, both of them agreeing they needed some time apart. They tried to make things work but it just wouldn't, no matter how much they wanted it to. A week ago, they agreed to divorce and promised to remain friends.

Marshall had grown to hate his life in Michigan. He hated the small apartment he lived in. He hated his job that was a poor comparison to what he really wanted to do. He hated all the reminders of the perfect life he had only one year ago. All his friends had moved away or got jobs after graduating college and the only person he had left, was Tia but the horrible truth was that when they were together, it made breathing a little bit harder. Neither of them was able to move on with the other there to remind them of their little girl.

So Marshall decided he had to leave. He had to leave Michigan and get on with his life and allow Tia to do the same. Even though he knew there was no way he could ever forget Emily, he had to least try to move on.

He had called his best friend Luke, who had recently moved to New York and asked if he could stay with him. That where he was going tonight, he was making the ten hour drive, so he could clear his head before starting his new life.

He brought his finger to his lips and kissed the tips before tracing the name on the headstone again.

"I love you so much, Emmy…" He whispered, tears brimming his eyes. "And I miss you every single day…"

He slowly got to his feet, keeping his eyes focused on her name. "Sleep well, Princess…"

He forced himself to turn and walk away, knowing he would never leave if he didn't. He struggled to breathe as he moved further and further way. He always hated leaving because it felt like he was abandoning her.

"Marshall?"

He looked up and saw Tia leaning against his car. "Hey….What are you doing here?"

"I was hoping you would be here." She pushed herself away from the car. "I just…I needed to see you before you left."

He swallowed the lump in his throat and stepped closer to her. "I wanted to come see you but I didn't want to make things worse…"

She nodded understandingly. "I wish things were different, Marshall…I really, really do."

"I know…"

"I still love you." She stated, tears falling from her eyes.

"I know that too…" He reached out and pulled her into his arms. "I love you, so much…"

"I don't want you leave." She cried against his chest.

"I can't stay." He replied, resting his cheek on the top of her head. "I hate that idea of leaving you both here but I have to go…"

"It's not fair…We did everything right…We worked hard, we took care of our little girl…We loved each other…" She continued. "Why didn't it work for us?"

Marshall closed his eyes, as more tears filled his eyes. "I don't know, T...Maybe all the movies and fairytales are wrong…Maybe there is no such thing as a happy ending."

"We should sue them for giving us false hope…" She mumbled, pulling away from him and wiping her eyes. "You should go…It's a long drive."

He let his arms fall away from her and down to his side. "You have Luke's phone number and address, right? If you need me…"

"I know." She wrapped her arms around herself.

"Take care, okay?" He choked out. "Look after yourself."

"You too…" She nodded. "Be happy…Emily would want you to be…"

He couldn't stop the tears from falling this time and he didn't even try. "When you come here….when you talk to her…can you tell her I love her….That I'll never forget her."

"Of course…"

He stared at her for a few more seconds, taking in her face. Her long blond hair and deep brown eyes….All features that Emily had inherited…One of the reasons Marshall found it so hard to be around her.

He pulled her into his arms again but this time, he lifted her chin and kissed her softy, his hand moving up to cup her cheek gently. He broke the kiss with a few smaller ones before placing one of her forehead, letting his lips linger there.

"Thank you…" He whispered against her head. "For giving me the best five years of my life…"

He stepped back, taking one more look before reaching for the car door. It took all his strength not to look at her again as he got into the driver seat and started the engine. He gripped the steering wheel tightly as he pulled away.

When he reached the end of the road he couldn't help but looked back in the mirror, seeing Tia stood where she left her. It broke his heart knowing he was driving away from his wife and child, something he vowed never to do but this was the only way either of them would survive.

He would never forget Emily and would never want to but he had to start a new life now, without them. He could do what he had originally planned for himself before he Tia Wytte turned his life upside down….but he knew it would never be what he truly wanted.

**TBC**

**Okay, so not a Marshall we know. Next chapter will fast forward 16 years to his life in Albuquerque with Mary.**

**Please review and let me know what you think! **


	2. Chapter 2

**Hey, thanks to everyone who reviewed and followed this story! Hope you like the update! **

**Enjoy!**

**Unplanned Life**

"I'm going to go…" Marshall leaned closer to Mary to say.

"What?" She turned to face him. "We're here because we haven't been out for a beer in months…"

"I know…But this is just weird…"

"Why?"

"Because you're on a double date and I've tagged along!" He nodded his head towards Brandi, Peter and Raph who weren't paying the partners any attention.

"Technically, they crashed our night out…"

It had been a long couple of weeks and Mary had been feeling guilty about keeping her engagement a secret so long from Marshall. Since he found out there had been distant between the two of them and Mary missed her best friend.

Now it was Friday night and she managed to convince him to grab a beer with her, except when Raph had found out, he invited himself along with her family and instead of the Irish style pub they liked to go to, they ended up in a Mexican restaurant, ordering dinner.

"Hello…." Jinx's voice sang out as she walked towards the table.

"See, Jinx is here…So, you're not the odd one out." Mary patted his arm then noticed the look on his face. "What now?"

"You do realize that you just turned this into a triple date…With me coupling up with your mother?"

Mary stared at him for a few seconds before wincing. "Yeah, there's an image that'll haunt me for life…"

"I'm going to go." He said again, standing up but he didn't notice a woman and ended up colliding with her. "Oh, I'm so sorry..."

"It's my fault…" The woman started but then trailed off. "Marshall?"

He looked up quickly and his mouth fell open. "Tia?"

"Oh my god…" She stared at him. "I can't believe it's you…"

He was still stunned to see her when she stepped forward and hugged him tightly. When she pulled away, he shook his head slightly, telling himself to get it together.

"You look amazing…" He told her, his hand automatically finding hers.

She let out a small laugh. "So do you…What are you doing here? Last I heard you were in Boston."

"I moved a few years ago…I work here." He replied. "What about you?"

"My niece is looking at colleges….She wanted to check out New Mexico State University." She explained.

"You have a niece?"

"Yeah, Tayler…She's just about to turn 16." Tia gave him a small smile. "Jo and I took the summer off so she could see some colleges but I think she's more interested in getting out of Michigan."

Marshall's struggled to listen after she said 16…Realizing that a long time had passed since he last saw her. Tayler must have been born, not long after he left…He was suddenly hit with the memory of Emily. He still thought about her most days but over the years the memories became less raw. Except for times like this when it suddenly sneaked up on him and his mind starting working in overdrive…He would try and imagine what she would be like now…She would be 19 years old…A college student. She said she was going to be a doctor when she grew up…He wondered whether she would have kept her three-year old dream or think of another career she loved more.

"I'm sorry…I didn't mean to interrupt your evening…" Tia said, breaking him back to the present, recognizing the grief on his face.

Marshall glanced back when he saw her looking past him to the table. "You're not…This is my partner…Mary Shannon."

Mary stood up, looking between the two of them curiously. She had never seen Marshall so thrown by another person before.

"Mare, this is my…." Marshall started but then stopped suddenly, remembering he hadn't told Mary about his past and was guessing her finding out he had secrets would not go down too well. "This is Tia Wytte…"

"Nice to meet you…" Tia smiled slightly at her, noticing him stumbling over who she was.

"You too…" Mary replied, looking at Marshall again. Any other time, she would tease him about how nervous he seemed to be about her meeting a girl from his past but there seemed to be something different this time.

"How do you know, Marshall?" Brandi questioned, leaning forward eagerly.

Mary rolled her eyes. "Sorry, my sister likes to know everyone else business..."

Tia laughed quietly. "My sister is the same…"

"I'm Raphael…Mary's fiancée…" Raphael stood up and shook her hand.

"Fiancée?" Tia repeated. "But I thought…"

"She's my work partner." Marshall corrected her quickly. "I…uh, I joined the Marshal Service after leaving Michigan."

"You did?" She suddenly hugged him again. "Oh, I'm so happy you did."

It took him a second but then he hugged her back, remembering how perfectly she fitted into his arms.

"Wait…You didn't know he was a marshal?" Brandi asked. "So, you know him from a long time ago…."

"We went to college together." Tia explained taking a step back but still didn't pull her hand out of his.

"Wow, you must have some good stories on him…" Mary tried to lighten the mood. "Tell me, was he a bigger geek then, then he is now?"

Marshall sighed. "Mary…."

"I don't know…" Tia shrugged. "He's a pretty great guy…"

"Oh, you guys have a history…" Jinx waved a finger between the two of them.

"Come on, dish the dirt." Brandi teased. "We know hardly anything about Marshall's past."

"This is probably not the time or place to talk about this…" Marshall ran a hand through his hair.

"Why don't you join us?" Jinx invited, pulling out the empty chair beside her.

"Sorry… We were just about to leave…" Tia said quickly.

"Aunt Tia?"

They all turned around and again Marshall froze. He guessed the teenage girl was Tia niece because she looked exactly like Joanne and Tia; which meant she looked like Emily. She was the image of what he dreamed Emily would look like. He noticed Tia shooting him an apologetic look and he knew she had read his mind.

"Honey, why don't you give your Mom a call and see if she wants us to bring her back any dinner?" Tia suggested.

Taylor nodded slowly but her eyes were on Marshall. "Okay."

"Sorry about that." Tia turned back to Marshall once Taylor had walked back to their table.

"She looks like…"

"I know." Tia cut him off. "Look, I've ruined your evening…I'll leave you to get back to your dinner."

"But you haven't told us any stories yet." Brandi piped up, earning a glare from Mary.

"Sorry, I promised Taylor we would get some ice cream for dessert and my sister is back at the hotel with a headache, so…"

"They have ice cream here." Brandi stated.

"Brandi, stop it." Mary told her. "She doesn't want to stay…."

"I'm sorry…" Tia smiled politely. "Thank you for the offer though."

"There's a diner about 10 minutes from here…" Marshall told Tia. "They have the best pistachio ice cream…"

"My favorites."

"I remember…"

"Okay, there is definitely something between the two of you…" Jinx grinned. "College sweethearts? First love? The one that got away…"

Tia looked to Marshall again to allow him to decide what to tell the group that seemed interested in her.

The only thing that was holding Marshall back from telling them the truth was that Mary didn't know. He didn't know how she would react to finding out in the middle of a busy restaurant in front of her family. Their friendship was complex…special…It wasn't a normal friendship. They didn't have to talk a lot to know what the other was thinking and they knew each other's weakness and strengths.

Then there was Tia…The love of his life…Jinx's three suggestions were correct and he knew Tia would not say anymore then Marshall wanted to but he also knew it would hurt her feelings by not admitting just how much they meant to each other.

"We used to be married…" He said quickly before he could change his mind and avoided looking at his partner. "We got married when we were 19…"

"Married?" Mary repeated, her mouth falling open as she stared at him.

"It's kind of a long story." Tia added and then glanced back to see Taylor stood by their table waiting. "I really have to go."

Marshall nodded and leaned forward to kiss her cheek. "It was really nice to see you."

"You too." She squeezed his hand before pulling it away and then hesitated to before speaking again. "Do you…do you want to join us?"

"What?"

"Come get ice cream with us…" She shrugged; trying to act like it was no big deal. "We could catch up….I've missed you."

"That would be great." Marshall answered without allowing his mind to come up with reasons why he shouldn't. He glanced back at the table behind them. Raphael and Peter, talking quietly with each other, seemingly not interested in them. Jinx and Brandi were grinning at him and Mary was looking back and forth between him and Tia. He knew she would want answers but he wasn't in the mood to give them to her tonight. "Mare, I'll see you tomorrow…"

"We were meant to hang out." Mary finally found her voice.

"I know but we can anytime." He replied. "I'm sorry…You guys have a great night."

"Marshall?!" She called after him but he was already gone.

"What the big deal?" Raph asked, looking up at her. "They've probably got a lot of catching up to do…."

"We had plans!"

"Well, we can still have a good night…" He frowned. "We don't need Marshall…"

She sighed and sat down but didn't say anymore. She didn't want to cause trouble by seeming to prefer to spend time with Marshall then her fiancée.

"How cool would it be if they got back together?" Brandi commented causing Mary to scowl.

"Don't be ridicules…" She told her sister. "That's not going to happen."

"I don't know…There was a spark there." Jinx added.

Mary rolled her eyes. "This is not some kind of lifetime movie…I know Marshall and that is not going to happen."

"You didn't know he used to be married…" Raph muttered.

"What?"

"I'm just saying, that maybe you don't know him as well as you think you did if he ever told you, he used to married."

"He's my best friend." Mary glared at him. "We don't need to know every detail of each other's past to know each other and I know there is something more there…I know there's something off about that woman."

"Oh, Mary…" Jinx sighed. "You have such a suspicious mind."

"No, Mom…I have a realistic mind and don't look at things through rose tinted glasses."

"Why don't we just move and order dinner?" Raph suggested, knowing Mary was growing more annoyed with each second.

"Fine." She muttered, picking up her menu.

She didn't want to discuss it any more than Raph did because she knew he wouldn't react well to her apparent jealous feeling towards the woman her partner just left with. She was not used to feeling jealous and had no idea why she felt like this. Marshall was her best friend and she was engaged to a great guy that she loved…She wanted her partner to be as happy as her…Happier than her. There was just something about Tia that Mary couldn't put her finger on. There was more to their story and Mary was wondering what happened that was so terrible that Marshall never spoke about this girl or his marriage. The only thing that she could think of was that it hurt him…that she had hurt him and if that was true, there was no way she was going to stand by and let her do it again.

_**XxXxX **_

"So, do you like it here?" Tia questioned Marshall as she sat opposite him in the diner's booth. Taylor had gone to the bathroom, giving them the first chance to talk.

"I do." He said truly. "It feels like home."

"Well, at least you're closer to your family here…"

"I do get to see Mike and Tommy a bit more." He referred to his brother. "But they both have families now and busy with work, it's not very often."

"What about your parents?"

Marshall sighed and shrugged. "My mom…she tries, I guess…but she acts like it never happened…that Emily was never here and I hate that…And Dad, well…He doesn't really talks to me…Which is fine by me because I don't think I could ever forgive them for how they acted…"

"Marshall…" Tia whispered, reaching across the table and placed her hand on top of his.

"Forget about all that…that's all old news." He forced a smile. "Taylor seems like a great kid..."

Tia grinned. "She is…It was hard at first, you know being around her…watching Jo being a Mom after everything we went through but in a way she helped me…I do miss being a Mom but I love being an aunt too…"

"I'm glad." Marshall said softly. "You could have called me, you know…If you needed to talk…"

"It was time to move on…for both of us." Tia stated. "And sadly, we needed to be apart to do that…"

"Yeah…" Marshall agreed with a sigh.

"Still didn't stop me from missing you though…" She added. "Or wishing things were different."

"Do you ever wonder what our lives would be like now if Emily was still here?"

"Something..." she admitted, looking down at their joined hands. "Sometimes it feels like it was someone else's life…"

"I know." He replied then ran a hand across the back of his neck nervously. "I'm sorry about earlier…With Mary…. I never told….She didn't know I used to be married."

Tia gave him a small smile. "I guessed."

"I don't like to talk about it to just anyone." Marshall continued. "And when she first transferred here, she wasn't too friendly…I mean, we got on well after our first job together but I think a part of me liked her because she didn't want to know about my personal life…."

"The problem is, Marshall…You're a likeable guy." Tia told him. "I bet it didn't stay like that for long."

"No, it did…She didn't asked many questions…Still doesn't…but I don't know, I guess she's going to be upset that I didn't tell her myself." He said. "She's not just my partner…She's my best friend….The closest person I've been to since you and I bet she's pretty pissed at me right now."

"You didn't have to say anything," Tia claimed. "I wouldn't have cared."

He laughed quietly and shook his head. "You always were a crappy liar…"

"Okay, I might have cared but still…Mary is your friend…And I'm just someone you used to know."

"You're wrong." He told her. "You're more than that…Always will be."

Before either of them could say anymore, Taylor dropped down into the booth beside Tia. Marshall pulled his hand away from Tia's and sat back.

"So, Taylor…Your Aunt says you're looking at colleges… New Mexico is on your life?"

She nodded. "Yeah, they have a good Clinical Law program."

"One of the best in country." Marshall replied, impressed. "You want to study law?"

She shrugged. "At the moment, I do…It seems interesting."

"Well, if you need someone to give you a tour of Albuquerque then I'm your man…"

"Really?" Taylor looked at Tia quickly before back at him. "You would do that?"

"Sure…"

"You don't have to…" Tia told him.

"No, it'll be fun." He assured her. "When are you leaving?"

"We're here until next Friday but we're going to University on Tuesday."

"Well, how about tomorrow afternoon…It's quiet at work at the moment and I could take a half day."

"Are you sure?" Tia questioned.

"Of course I am." He smiled at her. "Besides, I'm sure your sister can't wait to see me again."

"Mom hates you."

"Taylor!"

Marshall laughed again. "You thought I wouldn't remember that?"

Tia sighed. "She's going to think we planned this."

He shrugged. "Who knows, we're all older and haven't seen each other in a long time…things might be different now."

"This is Jo-Anne we're talking about."

"Well then we can just do what we used to do and sneak away from her…"

"Oh and that won't make her suspicious at all…"

"If she doesn't like it she doesn't have to come." Taylor remarked. "But I would love to look around…Albuquerque looks like such a nice place."

"It's great." Marshall turned to her. "And New Mexico State University has so much to offer…"

Tia sat back and watched the two of them talking with a small smile on her face. She could easily say that they were two of the most important people ever to her. Even though she hadn't seen Marshall in over 16 years, she never stopped thinking or caring about him. Then there was Taylor, she had a special relationship with the teenager. She babysat a lot for her while her sister went to work and they had always been close.

Watching them now, did make her a little sad, feeling the absence of Emily. Marshall had been an amazing father and even at the age of three, Emily had a Daddy's Girl…She knew if she was here now, they would probably be even closer. There was a selfish part of her that was actually happy that Marshall had re-married and had kids…She wanted him to be happy, she just glad no one had replaced her or Emily in his life.

**TBC**

**Please review and let me know what you think! Thanks! **


	3. Chapter 3

**Hey, thanks to everyone who review! Please keep them coming! **

**Enjoy!**

**Unplanned life**

By the next morning, Mary was even more annoyed. She hadn't slept well, her mind racing over what happened at the restaurant. She couldn't believe that Marshall had been married and never mentioned it to her. Okay, she may not have told him about her dumb choice about marrying Mark but she had been 17 and the marriage was over pretty much before the ink had dried on the documents. From what she saw last night, Marshall's marriage was more than that…It was real.

She entered the office and glared at her partner's empty desk as she made her way to her own.

"Good morning, Mary…" Stan greeted as he stood looking at a file in Eleanor's hands.

"What's good about it?" She muttered dropping her bag to the floor and shrugged out of her jacket.

Stan raised an eyebrow but didn't comment, used to Mary's early morning attitude.

The door buzzed and Marshall entered, with a paper bag in one hand and a tray of coffees in the other.

"Oh, nice of you to finally turn up." Mary said sarcastically, looking him up and down. "What took you so long? Had to go home to change your clothes?"

Marshall stared at her for a few seconds in surprised. "Excuse me?"

"What's going on?" Stan looked between the two of them.

"Marshall ran into an old friend last night…" Mary told everyone causing Marshall to sigh loudly. "Ditched me right in the middle of our night out…"

"I didn't ditch you…Your fiancée and family were with you…"

"To go on a date with his wife…." Mary raised her voice a little louder to be heard over his.

"What?" Eleanor questioned.

"Wife?" Stan repeated, focusing on Marshall.

"Yes, I got married when I was 19…got divorced when I was 23…" He told them then looked to Mary. "Happy now?"

"Are you kidding me?" Stan's mouth dropped open. "How come I never knew about this?"

"Oh, you weren't the only one…" Mary claimed. "I had the honor of finding out during dinner."

Marshall rolled his eyes. "We hadn't even ordered…"

"I don't understand…" Eleanor said. "Are you getting back together with her?"

"No, she's in town with her sister and niece until Friday…Last night was the first time I've seen or heard from her in 16 years." Marshall told her. "We got some ice cream and caught up with each other."

"Isn't that sweet…" Mary said sickly sweet.

"What is your problem?" Marshall glared at her.

"My problem is this woman turns up out of nowhere, saying she's your wife and you've suddenly turned into a love sick teenager." Mary shot back. "Turning your back on your friends…showing up late for work…"

"Actually, I started two hours ago…I've already seen the Thomsons and helped Marco Sanders find a job….Even stopped to get coffee and breakfast for everyone." He pushed the tray of coffee towards her and she had to grab with both hands to stop it from spilling_._ Before she could protest, he turned to look at Stan. "I was wondering if I could take the afternoon off…All I get left today, barring any emergencies, is paperwork."

"Sure, I don't see way not." Stan said, glancing at Mary who was still glaring at her partner. "Got anything nice planned?"

"I'm showing Tia and her family around Albuquerque then we're getting some dinner." Marshall informed him, feeling Mary's eyes burning a hole in the back of his head but he ignored it.

"Well, have fun…" Stan replied. "Maybe on Monday you can tell me all about this girl."

Marshall sighed. "Sure."

He gave another look Mary, daring her to say something but when she stayed silent, he went over to his desk.

"It must have been something bad…."

"What?" Marshall had just sat down when Mary spoke again.

"For you to keep it a secret…" Mary shrugged. "You ashamed about it or what?"

"Mary…let it go." Marshall warned.

"Or got another wife hiding out there somewhere…" She continued. "A bunch of kids…"

Marshall suddenly pushed to his feet again. "Okay, fine…You want to know the reason why I didn't tell you?"

She stared back at him, a little surprised by his reaction but determined to stand her ground.

"Because it's none of your business." He added. "Because I was someone different 16 years ago and it has nothing to do with who I am now or what I do…You have no right to my past, especially since you've never taken the time to take an interest in it before."

"Marshall…"

"You're just pissed because you didn't get your own way last night…That I didn't stay with you." He refused to let her cut him off. "Even now, I tell you to back off…To leave it alone and you still push and push…"

"We're partners…We're meant to be friends…Best friends and you never mentioned it…"

"Because it hurt!" He raised his voice slightly and then took a deep shaky breath before continuing a little more quietly. "I loved her…A lot…I was planning on spending the rest of my life with her and then…."

"Then what?" Mary prompted.

"Sometimes things happen that you have no control over…Neither of us did anything wrong but it changed us…It was hard being near each other… we were broken and there nothing we could do to fix it…I had to leave."

Mary stared at him, her mouth slightly open. She suddenly felt a mixture of guilt for pushing the issue and sadness because there was a side to him that she didn't know about.

"Marshall…" Stan broke the silence, from where he was still stood with Eleanor. He was thankful that there wasn't no else in the office to witness what had just happened.

"Yeah?" Marshall swallowed the lump that rose in his throat and forced his eyes away from Mary to their boss.

"I can't remember the last time you had a full weekend off…and that paperwork can wait until Monday…If you want to go now…."

He hesitated, a part of him wanted to escape the office and the questions that were bound to follow but then there was another part that wanted to stay and face it. He had worked hard over the last 16 years putting this all behind him; he didn't want to hide away again.

"Marshall…" Mary put the coffees down on her desk and when she turned back to face him, she saw him pulling on his jacket.

"Thanks, Stan…" The need to avoid any more questions won and he made a quick exit.

"Marshall?!" Mary called after him and when she made to follow him, Stan reached out to stop her.

"Let him go." He advised.

"But…"

"There's one thing you should never meddle in when you don't know the full story and that's matter of the heart." Stan told her. "Let him cool down and then talk to him…I don't think he'll react well if you push him on this, Mary."

"Fine." She pulled her arm free and stormed back to her desk.

Stan and Eleanor shared a look but they both knew better than to say anything.

_**XxXxX**_

"Is she still glaring at me?" Marshall whispered to Tia.

He had joined them for lunch and Jo-Anne hadn't been pleased at all. She barely spoke to him and continued to watch his every move. Marshall had suggested they'd go to one of his favorite delis and have a picnic in the park but when they had sat down at the picnic table, Jo had choose to sit on one behind them.

Tia laughed lightly and glanced over his shoulder at her sister. "Yep."

"It feels like old times."

"If we're quick and run now, we might get away…."

"Ah but what Taylor?"

"Oh yeah…We can't leave her behind." Tia conceded. "It'll be fine…If she wasn't to sulk all day then she can…I'm not going to let her ruin our day."

Marshall smiled and reached over to take her hand. After he had walked them back to the hotel the night before, Tia and he stayed in the bar for hours, just talking. He told her about how he threw himself into joining the Marshal Service after leaving Michigan and all the different cities he lived him. She told him how not much had changed for her, except six months ago her mother had passed away. Marshall was devastated, Anne had been like a mom to him and he wished he had known, so he could have been there.

He couldn't believe how easy it was to be around each other even after all this years and after everything that had happened He knew he was putting his heart on the line by getting close to her again but he couldn't help it.

"Uh, isn't that your partner?"

Marshall turned and sighed when he saw Mary heading in their direction.

"Hey…"

"Did you put a trace on my truck or something?" He questioned when she reached them.

"This was the place you took me when you give me a tour and then when we took Brandi…" She shrugged. "I took a guess…"

"Mare…"

"I just wanted to talk to you…I won't keep you long."

"I'll give you a minute." Tia smiled at him as she got up and walked over to join her sister and niece.

Marshall watched her go and when he looked back to his partner, she was waving a napkin

"White flag…"

He smirked. "Cute…You don't do cute."

"Oh yeah." She dropped it back down to the table. "Look, I'm sorry I was a bitch this morning…I just….I thought I knew everything about you."

"I didn't keep it from you because I wanted to keep it from you." He told her. "I just didn't want to talk about it."

She nodded understandingly. "I eloped when I was 17…"

"Excuse me?"

"I ran off with my boyfriend and we got married." She told him. "We got it annulled a month later…"

"You were married?"

"Yes, I didn't tell you because it was stupid and embarrassing….One of the dumbest things I've done in my life." She claimed. "I also never thought it would ever come up so…"

"Mary…"

"I guess that's why it hurt to find out I didn't know this about you…because unlike my marriage, yours was obviously real." She continued. "But you were right, I never asked and it's not like I've been completely honest about my past."

"I never meant to hurt you, Mare…" He told her. "I was just trying not to hurt me."

"I know." She gave him a small smile. "So, are we good now?"

"Of course."

"Great, Eleanor won't give me back my stapler until I apologies."

"After all these years, all I had to do to get you to apologies was to steal your stapler?"

"Well, let's be honest…Who knows what else Eleanor is capable of."

"You're scared of her…" Marshall grinned.

"Shut up…I'm not." She glared at him. "But talking of scary…Why is that woman giving you the stink eye."

"That's Tia's sister…She's not my biggest fan." Marshall replied without turning to see who she was talking about.

"Someone that doesn't like you? I've got to meet her…"

"Mary!" He tried to block her but she pushed past him and was walking to the next table.

"Hey, sorry to interrupt your lunch…"

"You don't have to go into work, do you?" Taylor looked up to Marshall in concern.

"Nope, he's all yours for the day." Mary answered for him.

"Really? If you have work to do…" Jo started.

"No, I just stopped by to clear some things up." Mary gave her a fake smile. "I'll let you get back to it…Marshall gives the best tours."

"You're not helping, you know…" He muttered loud enough for just her to hear.

"Who said I was trying to?" She shot back.

"Do you want to join us?" Tia offered.

"Mary has to go now…" Marshall cut in.

"Sorry, I have plans, thanks for the offer though." Mar smiled at her before giving Marshall a look. "But if you're still in town on Thursday, you should all come to my place…"

"What?" Marshall questioned in surprised.

"Yeah, it's my sister's birthday and we're having a little party…Be great if you could make it…You can tell us those story you didn't get chance to tell last night."

"Mary…"

"What?" She grinned at her partner. "It'll be fun."

"Uh….thanks…" Tia looked between the two of them, unsure what was going on.

"Marshall will give you the details." She patted his shoulder as passed him. "Have a fun day."

"She seems nice." Tia commented as they watched her walking back towards exit.

"Yeah…" Marshall agreed. "That's actually a little worrying…"

"What?"

"Nothing…Don't worry about it." He shook his head. "Right, so shall we get going?"

**TBC**

**Please review! **


	4. Chapter 4

**Okay, so this isn't one of my popular stories which is a shame because I like writing it….I hope there are some people still reading…There are a few plots twists and surprises coming up. **

**Enjoy! **

**Unplanned Life**

The tour of Albuquerque turned out better than Marshall imagine. They all seemed to enjoy themselves, even Jo although she would never admit it. Then when it came to deciding where they were going to go for dinner, Jo claimed she was too tired and was heading back to the hotel. Tia had rolled her eyes in annoyance when Jo insisted that Taylor go with her but refused to even discuss going back herself. Eventually, Jo gave up trying to convince her sister to stay with them and took her daughter, leaving Marshall and Tia alone.

"I'm surprised she thinks the two of having dinner together is a better option than the four of us." Marshall commented when they were seated at Marshall's favorite place to eat, a small Italian restaurant.

"She probably doesn't but she's too stubborn to admit her plan backfired." Tia chuckled. "I feel sorry for Taylor missing out but I'm actually pretty glad it's just us."

Marshall smiled. "Me to."

"So, tell me more about what you've been up to?" Tia asked, sipping her wine after they had ordered their food.

"Work keeps me pretty busy." He told her. "I take a few classes at the local college when I get chance."

She smiled. "That sounds like you."

"What about you?" Marshall questioned.

"Well, my life isn't as exciting…When Mom got sick, I moved back in with her to take care of her." She answered. "I was actually glad when Taylor asked me to join them this summer…I needed to get away."

Marshall reached over the table and covered her hand with his. "It must have been hard."

She shrugged. "We both know how hard life can be."

"Yeah…" He agreed. "But I'm glad you did come…I'm glad we've had chance to catch up."

"Me too." She smiled. "It's been too long…"

"I promise from now on we'll keep in touch." He told her. "I don't want to lose you again."

Her smile widened. "Even with my sister glaring daggers at you?"

"I'm a US Marshal…I can handle Jo."

"That I would like to see."

The evening seemed to go by so quickly and they soon found themselves outside the restaurant, the last customers to leave but neither of them was eager for the night to end.

"So…" Marshall started. "Would you like me to walk you back to your hotel or…?"

"Or?" Tia prompted.

"Or we could go somewhere else?" He suggested.

"I think you've shown me most of Albuquerque…but there is one place I've not seen…"

"Oh yeah? Where?"

"Your house." She replied, threading her fingers through his and stepped closer to him.

Marshall stared down at her in surprise. "You sure?"

"Yeah…" She nodded, reaching up and brushing her lips lightly against his.

"What about your sister?"

"You said could handle her…" She answered, teasingly.

He grinned and this time it was him that leaned down to kiss her. "Let's go."

_**XxXxX**_

When Mary arrived at work on Monday morning, she wasn't surprised to find Marshall sat at his desk, deep in work already, just like normal. Except, there was a hint of a smile on his face and she studied him as she took her seat.

"Good weekend?" She questioned and resisted the urge to roll her eyes when she saw him fighting to keep the grin off his face.

"Yeah…It was nice."

"Uh-huh." Mary replied, opening a random folder on her desk and pretended she was more interested in that rather than the fact that her best friend obviously got it on with his ex-wife over the weekend.

Marshall returned to his work, wanting to get it done as quickly as possible so he would not need to stay late tonight.

"I was thinking…" Mary started, gaining his attention again. "We should go for that beer tonight…This time I won't tell my family."

"I uh…I have plans." Marshall told her. "I promised I would go to the movies with Tia and her niece."

"The movies?" Mary repeated. "Don't they have movie theaters in Michigan? Why come all this way to just go see a movie?"

"There's something Taylor wants to watch." Marshall shrugged. "I said I would go."

"Well, have fun." Mary tried to act like she didn't care. "But if you change your mind and want to spend some time with the grownups, give me a call."

Marshall just smiled and turned back to his computer. He knew Mary didn't understand and would probably call him every word for stupid there was for allowing Tia back into his life so easily. He thought about the previous day, how they just stayed at his house all day and hung out. It felt just like old times and he could not remember when the last time had so much fun.

"You're still coming to Brandi's party Thursday, right?" Mary interrupted his train of thought again.

"I don't know, Mare…" He replied. "They got back on Friday…I don't know what we'll be doing Thursday night."

Marshall tried to ignore the pang in his stomach at the thought of Friday coming around too quickly.

"I meant it when I invited them too." Mary told him.

"Mare…" Marshall sighed, wishing she would just drop it. He didn't want to say out loud how hard it would be to say goodbye to Tia and how he might want their last night to be just the two of them. She wouldn't understand... she didn't know them or what they've been through.

"What?" She demanded. "I'm just saying…Brandi is looking for to this party but doesn't exactly know a whole lot of people aside from a few friends from school..."

"I'll try, Mare." He answered. "Maybe for an hour or something."

"Right."

Mary wanted to tell him, he was being crazy. That he should not let his life get turned upside down by a girl he hadn't seen since college but she didn't want to risk upsetting him again. If anything, by the end of the week, Tia and her family would be gone and Mary would take Marshall out, get him drunk until he realized how much better off he is.

_**XxXxX**_

They spent the afternoon taking care of a new witness and thankfully there had not been any emergency. When they returned to the office, Mary noticed Marshall watching the clock closely and she knew if she was a good friend then she would offer to finish the paperwork so he wouldn't be late but something stopped her.

"The Hartmans get settled into the motel?" Stan asked, exiting his office.

"Yep, everything is done." Marshall put down his pen and stood up. "If there's nothing else..."

"Actually, there was something I need to talk to you about." Stan told him, nodding his head towards his office.

Marshall glanced at Mary questionably but she just shrugged. "Okay…"

Stan closed the door and gestured Marshall to take a seat. "Okay, so this is a little…."

"A little what?" Marshall asked when Stan trailed off. "Stan, what's going on?"

The older man sighed. "I got a phone from a Chief Terry Winters."

"From the Michigan office." Marshall said knowingly.

"Yeah, said you had express an interest in transferring…He asked me what kind of Marshal you were."

"What did you say?"

"That you were one of the best…" Stan replied. "That I would hate to lose you."

Marshall sighed. "I'm sorry, Stan…I didn't know he would call you…I wouldn't have…"

"What? Started looking for a new job?"

"I'm not…I don't if I want to go or not." Marshall told him. "I was just looking at my options."

"I'm guessing this has something to with the girl that's turned up…"

"Tia."

"Just think about this before you do anything stupid…" Stan advised. "She's only been here a few days…"

"Stupid?" Marshall repeated, staring at his boss.

"You know what I mean…" Stan dismissed the comment. "Don't rush into anything…"

"You don't even know her." Marshall cut in defensively. He couldn't help but think about how his family reacted to his relationship with Tia and angry started to rise inside him.

"Well, there must have been a reason why you divorced in the first place…" Stan said but then realized what he had just said.

"Okay, I'm not sitting here listen to this." He stood up. "Unless you're going to tell me this is affecting my work then you have no right to say anything about my relationship outside of this office."

"Just wait a minute…" Stan followed him out. He hadn't meant to upset Marshall; he had just wanted to give him some advice.

"I'm done for the day." He moved over to his desk to grab his jacket. He was sick of people interfering in his life when things were going well for him.

"What's going on?" Mary asked, looking between her partner and boss.

"I'm going home…" He stated. "Unless there's a problem with any of my witnesses then I'll see you tomorrow."

Mary watched stunned as he stormed out of the office.

"Stan, what the hell?"

"Remember how I said to you that the heart is the one thing you should never meddle in when you don't know the whole story?"

"Yeah…"

He sighed. "I should have taken my own advice."

**TBC**

**Please review and let me know what you think! It's a different Marshall then we all know but I hope you stick with this story. I think (hope) you'll enjoy the upcoming plot twists. **


	5. Chapter 5

**Wow, so I was wrong when I thought no one was really interested in this fic. Thank you so much to everyone that reviewed! I was so pleased to get so many…please keep them coming. **

**Enjoy! **

**Unplanned Life**

Mary had drove by Marshall's house on the way home from the office but saw the lights off and his truck wasn't in the driveway. He didn't pick up when she called his cell either and she had considered making up some work emergency to get him to call her back but decided that would only make matter worse. She left one message, telling him she just wanted to make sure he was okay to give a call. She still couldn't help but worry once she got home and despite Raph's efforts of a romantic meal for the two of them, she couldn't stop thinking about what happened between Marshall and Stan.

Stan wouldn't tell her what happened and Mary struggled to think what their boss could have said that would set Marshall off. He was normally cool and collected, especially when someone did say something stupid and irritating.

"Mary?"

She looked up from her plate and across the table at Raph. "I'm sorry, what?"

"Are you okay?" He asked. "You're not eating."

She sighed and leaned back in her chair, dropping her fork. "I'm not hungry."

"Has something happened?" He questioned but then sighed when she didn't answer. "Let me guess, its work and you can't talk about it."

"Raph…" She started.

"Maybe I could help you…" He stood up, grabbing both their plates to carry to the sink, even though Mary's was still pretty full. "Did you ever think of that? Do you ever think to ask for help?"

Mary stared at him for a few seconds in surprise at his anger, not knowing where it suddenly came from.

"Okay, fine…" She got to her feet too and leaned back against the table so she was facing him. "I have a friend…who is worried about someone they care about….Worried that they're setting themselves up to get hurt."

Raph shot her a look and then turned back to the sink, muttering something in Spanish.

"What?!" She threw her hands up in the air.

"I'm not as dumb as you think I am and you're not as cryptic as you would like to be." He answered. "You're talking about Marshall and his wife."

"Ex-wife." Mary corrected.

"Why do you care so much?" Raph asked. "He's a big boy; he can take care of himself."

"I don't want him to get hurt." She claimed. "He's my friend and this has disaster written all over it."

"Maybe not…maybe they're meant to be together." Raph replied but Mary rolled her eyes. "Some people would find it romantic."

"Look, you don't understand…" Mary crossed her arms, in annoyance. "You don't know what Marshall is like…He doesn't deserve to get hurt."

"He's having a romance, Mary…Maybe it'll last a week and then things go back to normal…Maybe it'll last longer." Raph said. "If he wants your advice he'll ask for it…if he turned up and interfered in our relationship, how would you feel?"

Mary opened her mouth to reply but fell silent. Deep down she knew Marshall wasn't too thrilled with her engagement but she ignored it. She had no idea what she would do if he came out and said something about it.

"Just let him enjoy it." Raph suggested turning back to the sink and started washing the dishes.

Mary sat back down in her seat, thinking over what Raph had said; she hated that he was right. She suddenly stood up again and reached for her car keys.

"Where are you going?"

"To talk to Marshall…"

Raph sighed, shaking his head a little but said no more. He said all he had to say on the matter and knew she probably wouldn't listen anyway.

_**XxXxX**_

Mary was relieved to see Marshall's truck parked in his driveway when she arrived at his house. She knocked loudly and waited impatiently for an answered. When she heard voices and giggling, she started to regret turning up. Marshall had told her that he spending the evening with Tia and her family. She briefly considered turning and leaving but then the door opened and she was face with Tia, dressed in just a shirt. She recognized it as one of Marshall and noticed that she had his wallet in her hand too.

"Oh, Mary…" Tia blushed a little. "Hi."

"Hi." Mary smiled awkwardly.

"We uh…we were waiting for pizza." She explained.

"Right, well I just come by to talk to Marshall about something…"

"Of course, sorry…" She stepped aside. "Come on in…"

As she entered the hallway, Tia closed the door behind her and Marshall appeared, walking down the stairs, pulling on a t-shirt.

"Was that the pizza…?" He started but when the t-shirt was over his head he saw Mary stood there. "Mary?"

"Hi." She gave him a little wave.

"What are you doing here?" He asked.

"Just wanted to talk to you about something…."

"I'm going to grab a shower." Tia announced, moving past Mary and handing Marshall his wallet before going up the stairs.

Marshall turned to watch her disappear before facing his partner again.

"So, was the movie good?" She asked.

"Yeah, we caught the early show because Jo wanted to spend the evening with Taylor." Marshall explained, nodding his head towards to the kitchen, gesturing her to follow. "Want a beer?"

"Sure." Mary shrugged.

"Did Stan send you?" He asked, popping the cap off and handing it to her.

"No, he actually told me leave you alone and not get involved." She replied. "Wouldn't even tell me what you argued about."

Marshall sighed. "I probably overreacted."

"Come on, Marshall…that's not you."

"He said something…Pushed some buttons that he didn't know he was pushing." Marshall said cryptically. "I'll talk to him in the morning."

"He did seem to regret what he said…" Mary told him.

Marshall nodded and they drank for a few seconds in the silence. "So, was that all you came over for?"

"I just…I wanted to make sure you were okay."

He frowned. "I'm fine…I told you, I overreacted…"

"Not about that." Mary cut in. "About this…About Tia."

"Mary…" He started warningly.

"No, just listen." She placed her beer bottle down. "If she makes you happy…then great…I know I've only meet her couple of times but she seems nice but I just want you to be careful."

"Don't worry about me."

"You're my only friend, Marshall…Of course I'm going to worry about you." She claimed. "Just like you worry about me."

"I'm a grown man. I know how to take of myself."

"I know but still…" She trailed off. "Don't go and get your heart get broken, okay."

"It's not always that simple."

"She's leaving at the end of the week."

"That's the thing…" Marshall ran a hand through his hair. "I don't know if I can let her go again."

Mary fought every urge to tell him to end things now before he got in any deeper. She couldn't see an ending where it wouldn't end in disaster. Tia would either leave him heartbroken when she returned home. She may move to Albuquerque but from the little Mary knew about her, she figured she wouldn't want to leave her family. Then there was the chance that Marshall would follow her back to Michigan and Mary would lose her best friend.

"What?" Marshall asked, knowing that Mary was debating something in her head. "Just say it."

"That's the thing…I don't know what to say." She admitted. "Apart of me wants to tell you to stay away from her…To protect your heart but I know you…I know you won't do that."

"She really is great, Mare." He assured her. "I think you two would get along well."

"Just promise me you won't make any crazy decisions…that you will really think about it."

"You know me…I think twice about everything." He assured her with a smile.

Mary returned the smile but she knew this was different. Whenever Marshall's heart was involved, it always cloudy his judgment slightly. The witness with children were the main ones and she always wondered whether that's why Stan gave her the lead on cases with kids because Marshall always got too involved with them.

"And whatever you decide, you can talk to me." She continued. "About anything, Marshall…I want to be here for you."

Marshall looked a little bemused by her reaction. "Thanks, Mare…"

"I mean it…Even if you decide that you need to leave New Mexico." She stated and he raised an eyebrow. "If you want to talk, I'll be here to listen."

Marshall was touched by her offer. His decision about leaving Albuquerque would be a lot easier if Mary wasn't in his life. The thought of leaving her and not seeing her every day was hard to imagine.

"I appreciate that, Mare…I really do."

She nodded a little. "I just don't want to go through you getting shot to realize there are worse things that can happen then you moving to a different state."

"Look, why don't you stay for pizza." He suggested, changing the conversation and Mary noticed he didn't confirm nor deny he was considering leaving.

"I don't want to intrude on your night..."

He laughed lightly. "When has that ever stopped you in the past?"

"It was never your wife in the past." Mary commented.

"Come on, Mare…Stay and get to know her."

"I should go." She claimed. "Raph is probably wondering where I am."

At the mention of her boyfriend, Marshall gave up. "Okay, if you're sure."

"I'll see you tomorrow?"

"You bet." He nodded and followed her to the door. "And Mare, I really do appreciate what you said."

"I know you do." She smiled at him before opening the door and stepping out of the house. "See ya."

She didn't look back as she walked down the driveway to her car. She meant what she said; he was her best friend and she wanted him to be happy but it didn't mean she wasn't terrified she would lose him. Especially since she had just given him, her approval to go.

_**XxXxX**_

"I cannot eat another bite…" Tia groaned and fell back onto the bed.

Marshall picked up the almost empty pizza box and placed it on the floor beside the bed from lying down beside her.

"This is just like old times…" Tia rolled onto her side to face him. "We used to always eat dinner in bed, watching crappy TV."

Marshall laughed. "That because the only furniture we had was a bed."

"True." She nodded. "But despite how small our apartment was or our lack of furniture, I loved our place."

He smiled softly. "Me to."

"I still can't believe you painted our bedroom green."

"It was the only color that was on sale and we couldn't afford much else." He reasoned. "Anyway, I thought you liked it."

"I did…It made the apartment funky."

He rolled his eyes. "Yeah, that was the theme I was going for…"

"Plus, anything that covered up that god awful wallpaper that was up when we first moved in."

"Oh yeah…"

She sat up and kissed his cheek quickly before settling back down, this time, putting her head to his shoulder.

"What was that for?"

"I just don't think I ever thanked you for making everything so special at the time." She answered. "I mean, most guys would have run a mile when I found out I was pregnant, especially with your family insisting you go home too…"

"Hey, I loved what we had…Even if it was cramped two bed apartment with terrible decor." He told her. "And no matter what anyone said, I was never going to leave you."

"I just wished things had been different…" She whispered, fingering his t-shirt. "It's not fair that our lives got turned upside because of someone else's mistake."

Marshall sighed quietly, putting his arm around her and pulling her a little closer. He had been angry at the time when the guy responsible for Emily's death had only been sentence to 18 months in prison…not when he and Tia had lost their little girl…They were the ones with the life sentence. He had been attempted several times to use his resources to look him up and found out what he was up to since but always stopped himself, knowing he would never find anything that would make him feel better and if anything, it would probably only make him feel even more bitter about the whole thing.

"I would do anything to change the past…" He lightly ran his fingers up and down her arm. "But there is no use in wishing because it's not going to happen…I guess we just have to try and live our lives the best we can."

She nodded a little. "And you're happy here, right?"

He looked down at her. "It feels wrong to say I'm happy."

"Why?"

"Because if what happened didn't happen then I would probably still be in Michigan…We could still be married and have more kids…I wouldn't be in the Marshal Service." He replied. "To say I'm happy now feels like I would be saying I'm happy my life didn't turn out like that."

"No, Marshall…" She shook her head and sat up. "You've just made the best out of a terrible situation…I know how much you loved Emily…I know, she was your heart."

He sighed and ran a hand down his face, trying to get a hold of his emotions. He wasn't used to talking about her. His parents never spoke about her and he thinks his brothers unsure about bringing her up or not.

"Do you want more children?" She asked.

"I don't know." He answered honestly.

"Why not? You were a great Dad."

"I guess it's just changed my view on fatherhood." He sat up, leaning against the headboard. "Also, my job isn't exactly ideal to raise a family."

She sat up to, her hand moving to his chest and towards his right shoulder. He tensed when it stopped directly over his scar. He knew she had noticed it but she hadn't brought it up.

"What happened?" She asked.

He shrugged, trying to act as if it was no big deal. "I was shot last year…Wouldn't have been too serious if Mary and I wasn't stuck in the middle of nowhere."

"Were you scared?"

"Of dying?" He questioned and she gave a small nodded. "No."

"Why not?"

"Because…" He started then paused for a second, trying to find the right words. "Because I had nothing lose and everything to gain."

Her eyes widened slightly at his words. "Marshall…"

"I know, it sounds crazy but all I could think about was seeing her again…being with her." He closed his eyes and leaned his head back. It was why he didn't care about himself when he stood back up to protect Mary. It was why he insisted she leave him and get herself out of there. It was why he didn't panic at any time in the gas station. Then Mary had told him, he was her only friend and that he couldn't quit. It changed everything…He couldn't leave her without a fight.

"Hey…" Tia placed a hand on his cheek and turned him to face her. "Please, don't do that."

"Do what?" He whispered.

"Please don't play the hero…please don't die." Tears filled her eyes. "I couldn't take it if I lost you too."

He leaned forward and placed a short soft kiss on her lips. "I'm not going anywhere…I promise."

**TBC**

**Yep, so Marshall is getting in deeper and deeper. Still lots more to come. Please review and let me know what you think. **


	6. Chapter 6

**Hey, I hope you all had a great Christmas and have an even better new year. Thanks for all the reviews. I'm glad you like Tia character…But I'm not sure you will after this. Lol. Please review and let me know what you think. **

**Enjoy! **

**Unplanned Life**

Tia looked into the mirror and saw Marshall sat on the bed, watching her as she applied some make up. "Shouldn't you be getting ready for work?"

"I don't want to go."

She turned on the chair to face him. "I could never get you to play hooky in college, so I find it hard to believe you'll start now."

He pushed himself to his feet and walked over to her. "You're leaving tomorrow."

She threaded her finger through his. "I know."

He sighed and used his free hand to run through his hair. "I don't want you to…"

"Marshall…"

"I've been looking into transfers." He informed her. "There's an opening…I could move back."

Her mouth opened a little as she stared up at him. "To Michigan?"

"Yes." He nodded. "I meant it when I said I didn't want to lose you again…"

"No."

"But…"

"No, I'm not letting you leave your life here." She stood up and placed a hand on his cheek. "Not again."

"I want to be with you." He pulled her closer. "I need you."

"You were miserable in Michigan…" She whispered. "There are too many bad memories."

He looked down at her, not able to deny it. "That's true…but it's true for both of us…"

She laid her head in his chest and sighed. "I guess…"

"You could always leave there."

"And move here?" She pulled back again.

He shrugged. "We could go anywhere…"

"You're serious?"

"Of course…Remember how we always planned on travelling when we were in college, we could do that now."

"What about your job?"

"I love my job but I love you more…I want to be with you."

"I don't know…"

"Come on, it'll be fun…We could go to Paris, Rome, Sidney…Anywhere in world."

"You're crazy…" She shook her head.

He leaned down and kissed her softly. "Life is too short…We both learnt that lesson a long time ago."

"Yeah…"

"Just promise me you'll think about it."

"Will you go to work if I promise you I will?"

"Are you trying to get rid of me?" He questioned teasingly but knew he did need to get moving or he would be late. "You don't want to spend the day with me?"

"Of course I do but you need to go to work and I need to meet Jo…She'll flip if I cancel today."

"Okay, fine…" He took a step back. "But you're coming to Mary's tonight, right?"

"Are you sure that's a good idea?"

"Of course it is…I want you two to get to know each other." He told her. "And we only have to stay for an hour or so then we can have the rest of the night to ourselves."

She smiled a little sadly. "Our last night."

"For now." He reminded her. "I told you, I'm not letting you go this time."

She didn't say anything and instead hugged him. She wanted to believe that they could make things work. She really could be happy spending the rest of her life with him but she knew it wouldn't be as easy he claimed.

_**XxXxX**_

"This party sucks."

Marshall looked at Mary who was stood by his side. "Come on, it's not that bad."

"Oh please, the only people here are friends of Peter's and a few of Raph's buddies." Mary gestured around the room. "When Stan and Eleanor get here, even I will have invited more people then Brandi."

"She seems to be enjoying herself." Marshall commented, watching as Brandi laughed along with Peter and another couple. "And anyway, maybe she's making an effort to be friends with Peter's friends."

"I guess they're better the normal crowd she hangs out with." Mary shrugged. "So, did you get things with Stan sorted?"

It had been two days since the incident at the office and although they talked, the atmosphere was still off. Mary wasn't used to being the innocent party and didn't know whether she should step in or not.

"I told you we talked about it Tuesday morning…" Marshall sighed.

"But you're still pissed at him." Mary pointed out. "Even though you said you overreacted, there is still apart of you that's mad at him."

"It's complicated…In my head, I know I took what he said the wrong way but for the first time in a long while, I'm happy and can picture a future with someone…I guess, it got to me that my friends couldn't be happy for me."

Mary couldn't help but feel a little guilty. "You know we're just concerned, don't you? That we just want the best for you?"

"I know, Mare…" He said softly. "But I can take care of myself."

"Hey guys…" Brandi and Peter joined them before Mary had chance to say anymore.

"Hey, are you enjoying your birthday?" Marshall smiled at her.

"Yeah, this is great." She grinned. "And thanks for the book, I love it."

"You brought her a book?" Mary looked at him in surprise. "Wow, have I stepped into an alternative universe or something? Brandi is having a party where people are drinking from wine glass and not a keg of beer…and getting books as gifts instead of…well, a keg of beer."

Brandi rolled her eyes at her sister. "It's a book by the same guy who wrote the one that I've been studying at college…Marshall and I were talking about it the other week."

"I'm glad you like it…" Marshall said. "It's a good book…Let me know when you've read it and we'll discuss it."

"Oh that's a conversation which I would just love to be a part of…" Mary said sarcastically.

"You could always read it too…" Brandi suggested. "You never know, you might learn something."

"Yeah right…" She laughed.

"So, Marshall…" Brandi turned back to him, "Where's your lady love?"

"Brandi…" Mary said warningly.

"What?"

"Stop fishing for information." She told her. "And don't say lady love."

"She'll be here soon." Marshall said. "She has been spending the day with her sister and niece and is running a little late."

"She's actually coming?" Mary looked at him.

"Yeah, you invited her."

"I know but…"

"But what?" Marshall probed. "Is there a problem?"

"Of course not." She shrugged. "I just didn't think she would want to waste her last night in New Mexico at some dull party."

"Hey!" Brandi glared at her.

"You know what I mean." She waved her hand dismissively.

"Mare, tell me now if this is a problem because I can always call her and meet her somewhere else…"

"No, it's no problem…its fine." She insisted just as there was a knock on the door. "That must be Stan, excuse me."

Mary shook her head a little as she walked to the door, cursing herself for how she reacted. She knew she wanted Marshall be happy but she was struggling to come to terms with the idea that his future might not include her at all. When she pulled open the door, she was surprise to see it wasn't Stan but Taylor instead.

"Hey, is Marshall here?" The teenager peered past Mary into the house.

"Yeah, he is…" Mary stepped aside to invite her in. "Are you here with your aunt?"

"No, she and Mom are back at the hotel arguing… Marshall said it would was cool if I wanted to come to the party and I thought I could escape them for a while."

"Right, okay…come on in then." Mary forced a smile.

"Thanks."

She watched as Taylor head straight over to where Marshall was still talking with Brandi and Peter. She stayed where she was for a few minutes just looking at them and she couldn't help but notice the way Taylor was staring at Marshall…It was as if whatever he was saying was the most important thing in the world…she looked at him like he was the only person in the room.

"Oh hell…" She muttered.

"Everything okay, Inspector?" Stan stood in the still open doorway, causing her to spin around and see Eleanor with him.

"Yeah, just some more drama to go with all the other crap." She answered, moving out the way so she wasn't blocking their entrance.

"Excuse me?" Eleanor raised an eyebrow in question.

"Looks like my partner has a secret admirer…" She nodded her head towards them.

"Who is that?"

"His girlfriend's niece." Mary sighed, rubbing her forehead. "This just gets worse every day."

"Just let it go, Mary…" Stan warned. "Marshall can handle it."

"You keep telling me to stay out of it then it's you who goes interfering…" Mary pointed. "I'm not going to cause trouble…just point it out to him so he's aware."

"Mary…" Stan started but she was already walking away.

"Hey…" She said when she reached them. "Can I get you a soda, Taylor?"

"That would be great, thanks…"

"Coming right up…" She smiled. "Marshall, come and give me a hand."

He knew there was something she wanted to talk to him about in private and prayed they wouldn't have to go into work. "Uh, okay…I'll be right back."

Mary was leaning against the kitchen counter when he entered the room.

"What's going on?" He asked.

"Taylor seems like a nice kid…"

"Yeah, she's great…" He nodded.

"She's 15, right?"

"Nearly 16."

"Her father is not around?"

"He walked out when she was a baby." He answered.

"And her Mom never re-married?"

"Well, I don't have a full history on Joanne's love life but no, I don't think she was ever married." He said frustrated. "What the hell is this about?"

She sighed. "Just be careful with her, okay?"

"Carful?" He repeated. "Mary, what exactly are you saying?"

"My Mom dated a lot of loser when we were growing up but occasionally there would be a nice guy…someone who paid Brandi and me some attention." Mary explained. "It was Brandi more than me but it's easy to develop some kind of feelings for someone in that situation…"

"You think she has a crush on me?" His eye widened.

"Maybe." She shrugged.

"Tia is her aunt." Marshall claimed. "It's not like that."

"I know that and so does everyone else but I'm just saying, be careful."

He ran a hand over his eyes. He hadn't even noticed Taylor behavior towards him; he had been so wrapped up in Tia. When he looked towards her, he groaned when he saw Joanne had arrived…this was just what he needed.

Mary looked over too. "Wow, she looks pissed."

He sighed. "I'm sure whatever it is, it's my fault."

"What the hell did you do to her?" Mary questioned. "I think she's the first person I have ever met that doesn't like you."

He shrugged. "I don't know, I guess she just didn't approve of Tia and me."

"I'm sure she's thrilled about the new developments then."

"She looks it." Marshall muttered before heading towards them, know he would have to face her at some point and Mary was right behind him.

"I'm not going." He heard Taylor say as he got closer. "I'm staying here."

"I am not in the mood for this…let's go."

"No…"

"Jo, its okay if she wants to hang out for a bit." Marshall cut in. "You're welcome too."

She barely looked at him. "We have to go."

"I told you, I'm staying here." Taylor insisted.

"You're coming!" Joanne reached out to her but her daughter pulled away from her and stood beside Marshall.

"I'll be 16 soon and you can't stop me doing anything…" Taylor claimed. "I'm going to transfer schools…"

"Wait, what?" Marshall looked at her.

"I'm going to move here with Aunt Tia."

"Oh no, you're not…" Joanne shook her head.

"Look, why don't we all calm down and talk about this." Marshall looked between the two of them.

"There's nothing to talk about…" Taylor folded her arms. "I've already decided."

"Well, you're going to be disappointed because they're not even staying here." Joanne snapped.

"What?"

"Yeah, they're running off together…" She informed her and then looked at Marshall. "You know, I was beginning to think you had actually grown up…now that you had a proper career and everything but no, you're still the same person…the same guy with a head filled of fairytales."

Marshall was very aware they were attracting a crowd and saw that Taylor was staring at him with tears in her eyes.

"Let's step out into the backyard…" He suggested, placing a hand on Taylor shoulder, guiding her outside, knowing that Joanne would follow. He knew that he would have to explain to Mary and Stan what was going on but he could do that later.

Mary sent Stan a look when Marshall had left the room. "You still think we shouldn't get involved?"

He sighed. "I don't know what to do anymore."

It wasn't long before Tia turned up and Mary was ready to question her to get the answers that Marshall was holding back.

"Is Marshall not here?" Tia asked, looking around and not being able to see him.

"He's outside." Mary told her. "With your sister and niece."

She frowned. "They're here?"

"Yeah, Taylor turned up first, saying she was moving here with you then your sister told her that you and Marshall weren't sticking around." Mary folded her arms. "Care to tell me what the hell is going on?"

"I need to talk to Marshall…" She went to move past Mary.

"You need to tell what is happening." Mary stopped her.

"Look…" Tia started but was cut off by the door opening and Marshall appearing.

Mary turned around and was taken aback by the look on her best friend's face. She had never seen him look like that before…He looked stunned, hurt, confuse…all rolled into one.

"Marshall?"

"It's not true, is it?" Marshall whispered with his eyes on Tia. "Tell me it's not true."

"What's not true?" Tia stepped towards him.

"Tell me you wouldn't lie to me…that you would never keep anything from me." He pleaded.

"Marshall…" She started her voice trailing off when she noticed her sister stood in the doorway, her own eyes filled with tears. "What's going on?"

"Mom…" Joanne started. "She…..She told Taylor."

"Told her what?"

"She told her…" Joanne claimed. "She told her everything."

Marshall was shaking his head. "Tia, it's not true, is it…You wouldn't do that…Not me to."

She opened her mouth to say something but no words came out and all she could do was look between the two of them; unsure what to do next as the whole party came to a stop to watch what was going on.

"Tell me." Marshall exclaimed. "Tell me you didn't do this!"

"I'm sorry…" She whispered, not being able to stop her own tears. "I'm sorry…"

"No…" He shook his head. "This isn't true…This cannot be right."

She rushed towards him but when she reached for his hand he pulled away so quickly that he knocked into the table causing a few items to fall to the floor. "Please, Marshall…let me explain…"

"How?" He whispered. "How do you explain this?"

"I was scared…"

"Of what?" He asked. "Of me?"

"No!" She insisted. "It wasn't like that…"

"Then what was it like?" He questioned. "How could you do this after everything we went through?"

"You left! We were over…Whenever we were together we both hurt…You were right when you said we had to be apart to move on and we had to move on, Marshall or it would have killed us." She stated. "You were gone and trying move on…I couldn't drag you back…not when I knew I couldn't do it."

"So because you didn't want it, you denied it me too?"

"I'm sorry…I know I should have told you…I wanted to…this week, I tried to but…"

"But what?"

"You have this job which you love…but you also have wounds and scars…both physically and emotionally…" She reasoned. "I just couldn't add to it… not after you told me you didn't care about dying because you had nothing to live for and everything to die for."

Marshall froze at the words he had said a few days earlier and he suddenly realized how silent the room was. He glanced over and saw Mary staring at him; he knew how it sounded and he knew he would have a lot of explaining to do but right now he couldn't deal with that.

"I need to go…" He said. "I need to get out of here…I need air."

"Marshall..." Both Mary and Tia called out to him.

"Don't!" He said firmly. "Leave me alone…I can't breathe…just let me go."

Stan reached out and took Mary's arm to stop her as Marshall headed for the door.

"No, wait…"

She looked over at the sound of Taylor's voice and saw Joanne trying to stop her daughter.

"Dad!"

Marshall stopped abruptly and he slowly turned around. Mary had never seen him look so lost…She had never before wanted to grab him and get him as far away as possible.

"Please don't go…" Taylor begged tearfully and before anyone could say or do anything, she ran towards him and hugged him tightly. "Please stay."

Mary watched with wide eyes as tears started to slip down Marshall's face and he eventually wrapped his own arms around the teenager, resting his cheek against the top of her hand. Then after a few seconds, he stood up straight and gently pushed her away.

"I'm sorry…" He whispered.

"No…" She protested.

"You deserve better…You should go home and forget all about this." He stepped away as he spoke. "I can't do this…I'm not good enough for you…I'm sorry."

He turned and left as quickly as possible. Not daring to look back.

**TBC**

**Oh how I love a cliffhanger. Be honest, did you all see that coming? Please review and let me know what you think! **


	7. Chapter 7

**Hey, thank you all for the reviews. I'm glad that none of you saw Taylor being Marshall's daughter coming. I had been trying to put in some clue in the earlier chapter but didn't want to give it away. This is quite a long chapter, I hope you like it. Please review and let me know!**

**Enjoy!**

**Unplanned Life**

For a few seconds there was complete silence after the front door slammed behind Marshall. Then the whispers and murmurs started; all from people he didn't even know Marshall. Mary looked towards Stan; eyes wide, silently asking what she should do when Tia making a move caught her eye.

"Where are you going?" Jo-Anne grabbed her sister's arm.

"I need to find him…" Tia cried, shrugging her off. "I need to explain."

"And what about Taylor?"

"She has you." She replied. "Marshall doesn't have…"

"He has me!" Mary stepped forward. "You need to stay away from him…"

"Mary…" Tia started.

"No, I swear to god, if you got anywhere near him…" Mary made her way to the door, glaring at Tia the whole time. "I knew you were bad news…I knew you would end up hurting him…"

"You don't understand…"

"I don't care what you have to say…"

"Mary." Stan cut in.

"What?" She asked, daring him to tell her to stay out of it.

"Find him…" He told her. "I take care of things here…You take care of him."

"Make sure she doesn't follow me." She shot Tia another look.

Mary stormed towards her car, thankful she had parked on the street so no one was blocking her in and when she heard footsteps behind her, she spun around, expecting Tia but was surprised to see Raph.

"I can't talk…I need to go." She said, pulling her car keys out of her pocket.

"I can come to…" He offered. "Help you."

"Help me with what?"

"With Marshall…"

"No."

"Mary, please just let me…"

"No! God, Raph…what the hell do you think you can do?" She spun around again. "I get that we're in a relationship…that you want to share things but you don't get to be a part of Marshall and I."

He shook his head a little. "Do you even know how that sounds?"

"I don't care." She said, frustrated. "I don't care that I have a weird relationship with Marshall…I don't care that you don't understand it…all I care about is that he's out there hurting and I need to make sure he's okay because I know damn well he would be doing the same for me, except he's better at it than me."

"We need to talk about this…"

"Yeah, maybe we do…but not now." She told him. "I'm not going to say or feel any different in a few hours, days, weeks or months…I understand if you can't deal with that…You should know, this is my life and it's not going to change."

"Mary…" He called again but she was already getting into her car and starting up the engine. He sighed, watching as she sped away. He knew their relationship was in trouble and he didn't know how to fix it… or if it could be fixed.

_**XxXxX**_

It was almost 5am and Mary was still driving around looking for Marshall. She couldn't find him anywhere. She had gone to his house but wasn't surprised he wasn't there. She went to the office more than once and to the bars they liked to hang out at. She drove around the few places that she knew he went jogging or just to get some time alone to think…She even roped Bobby D in to help look for him.

Around 2:30am, she returned to the office for fourth time and stayed there for almost two hours, just waiting. Partly to see if he would turn up and partly to avoid going home. She had meant what she said to Raph but the only reason she said it was because she was angry at what Tia had done to Marshall. She knew she would have to face him eventually and she knew it was possibly the end of their relationship but it was probably for the best. She liked Raph, a lot…He had gotten closer to then most but she still kept up that barrier to keep him out of the part of her heart her father had crumbled when he left…Just like she did with everyone else…Except there was one person who got past all the walls she put up without her even noticing. One person that he been slowly rebuilding her heart, crumb by crumb…Now he was the one hurting and she wanted to be there for him.

When she reached his house again, she was relieved to see his truck parked in the driveway and although there were no lights, she prayed he was inside. She sent a quick text to Stan, letting her know where she was before making her way to the door.

She let herself in, using her key and quietly closed the door behind her. She glanced into the living room and saw it was empty before moving into the kitchen.

Her heart broke when saw her partner, sat on the floor, leaning back against the counter with a half empty bottle of scotch by his side. She entered the room fully and silently lowered herself to floor, sitting beside him.

"Don't…" He whispered, his eyes not moving from the window where the sun was beginning to rise.

"Don't what?"

"Don't ask about it." He told her. "Don't say anything about it…I can't talk about it…Please, Mare…I just can't."

His voice was low, barely recognizable as his and she could tell he was on the edge of losing the last thread of control that he somehow still had. She knew he had every right to be angry, upset, and heartbroken but she was surprised how much this affected him, making her think that there was more to it then she knew. Since Tia's arrival, there has always been something that didn't quite make sense…something that Marshall was holding back and although she understood the need, more than most, to keep what hurts him hidden, she needed to know so she could help him.

"How much have you drunk?" She questioned, softly gesturing to the bottle.

"None." He answered, honestly. "The smell made me feel sick…"

She sighed quietly; she may have been able to get more out of him if he wasn't completely sober. People thought she was the one that kept everything bottled up but Marshall was better at it…Most people didn't even realize he was doing it.

"I'm begging you, Mare…Just leave me alone."

"Okay…" She agreed. "Okay, we won't talk about Tia or Taylor."

Marshall tensed at Taylor's name, Mary saw him blinking a few time and wondered if he was trying to keep tears at bay.

"Can we talk about something else?" She asked and although, he didn't agree, he didn't protest either. "What's going on with us?"

He looked at her for the first time, his brow creased with confusion. "Us?"

"There's been something off with us…I know you've been busy with…." She paused for a second. "Been busy lately but even before that, we've been distant."

She could tell by the look on his face that he knew what she was talking about. "Things have changed, Mare…"

"Why?"

"Because you got engaged…" He looked away again.

"It's about Raph?" She asked. "That's why you stopped coming by the house? Why we don't go out anymore? Why there are no mores calls about some random documentary you're watching?"

"You're going to marry the guy, Mare… I was getting in the way."

"No."

"Mary…"

"You listen to me…You're my best friend…You were not and never have been in the way." She said firmly. "I've hated how things have been…I've missed you."

"I just…I just wanted you to be happy." He told her. "I didn't want to ruin what you have with Raph."

She hesitated before placing a hand on top of hers. "Well, we have something in common there…"

He looked at their hands before up to her, questionable.

"I don't want Raph to ruin what I have with you."

He leaned his head back against the counter with a thud and he closed his eyes. "You deserve to be happy, Mare…You deserve that life with Raph, the security and the love…"

"I have that with you…Especially the security." She squeezed his hand. "I never felt as safe with anyone else, Marshall…With work and outside."

"That was the problem, Mare…You can't have that with me and have a marriage with Raph." He claimed. "I had to step back…For you….and that's why…"

"Why what?" She prompted.

"Why it was so easy to fall back in love with Tia." He admitted his eyes still screwed shut tightly. "I wanted that love and security too…I needed it."

Mary opened her mouth to say something in reply but there was rap on the front door, startling them both.

"I'll get it." She pushed herself up to her feet.

"I don't want to see…." He started.

"It's okay, I'll play bodyguard." She flashed him a small smile before making her way to the door.

She was thankfully that it was just Stan on the other side of the door.

"You found him then?"

"Took a while but yeah…" She said, leaning against the frame.

"And how is he?"

"Not good." She admitted.

"I need to talk to him…" Stan told her, noticing that she was blocking the entrance.

"Give him the day."

"Mary…"

"Just give him the day, Stan…" Mary asked. "He needs time to breathe…"

"Let him in."

She turned and saw her partner stood in the hallway. She stepped aside without another comment and closed the door once Stan was inside.

"Marshall…" Their boss started. "How you doing?"

Marshall shrugged, wordlessly.

"I guess that's a bit of a stupid question." Stan added. "I know it's probably the last thing you want to do right now but we need to talk."

"Fine…" He sighed and walked into the living, dropping onto the couch, allowing Stan and Mary to follow him.

Stan glanced at Mary once but saw she looked just as unsure about what to do as him. Neither of them had seen Marshall like this in the past.

Mary stayed standing, hovering between the doorway and the hall while Stan took a seat in the armchair at the side of the couch.

"I've moved some things around…" Stan started. "I want you to take the week off…"

He was surprised when his inspector didn't protest but instead nodded, a little.

"Look, Marshall you don't have to tell me anything…What you do in your private life is your choice but what Tia said…" He paused, wary of how to approach this subject with him.

"When she said, I said I'd rather be dead than alive?"

"Yeah…I need to know, did you really say that?"

"She asked if I was scared of death…I said no, because I had nothing to lose." He admitted, leaving out the last part; knowing more questions would be asked and he wasn't ready for that but he didn't fool his boss, Stan knew there was more to it but decided not to push him.

"Okay, well I want you to talk to someone…"

"Come on, Stan." Mary interrupted. "You can't be serious."

"Mary…"

"You're seriously suggesting that he's suicidal?" She glared at him.

"I didn't say that." Stan shook his head.

"Marshall, tell him…" Mary looked to her partner. "Tell him he's being crazy."

"Forget it, Mare…I don't care…"

"What do you mean, you don't care?"

He sat forward, resting his elbows on his knees and rubbed his face with his hands. "Nothing is going to change just because I speak to someone…it won't make a difference."

"But…"

"But nothing…It's fine."

"I'll set something up." Stan cut in before an argument broke out. "Would you rather someone other than Shelley Finkel?"

"I don't care."

Mary rolled her eyes and folded her arms across her chest. This wasn't Marshall…Marshall cared…about everything.

"Like I said, I've cleared the week for you…You'll have a few days before an appointment." Stan stated. "Then we'll see how things go."

Marshall gave another nodded, pressing the heels of his hands into his eyes. Stan had just stood up; ready to leave when the doorbell rang. He glanced at Mary, silently questioning who that might be but she just shrugged, her eyes moving to Marshall but he hadn't moved.

"Why don't we go out for breakfast?" Mary suggested, deciding to ignore the door. She couldn't think of one person that Marshall would want to see right now.

"I could go for some pancakes." Stan commented rocking back and forwards gently as the bell rang again.

"We can go to that diner you like…" Mary said to Marshall. "Stan will even pay."

Stan rolled his eyes but all Marshall did was stand up and walk towards the door when the bell rang again.

"Marshall, leave it…" Mary advised and as she predicted, when he pulled open the door, Tia was stood there. "He doesn't want to see you."

Tia glanced at her but then looked back to Marshall. "Please, can we talk?"

"Didn't you hear me? He doesn't want you here!" Mary stalked towards the door and was surprised when Marshall blocked her.

"Go and get your breakfast, Mare." He said quietly, his eyes still on Tia.

"Are you kidding? I'm not leaving you here with her."

"I'll be fine." He assured her. "Go."

"Marshall…"

"Please, Mare…" He finally looked at her. "Just give us 15 minutes…Bring me something back."

"Come on, Inspector…" Stan joined them. "You've never turned down a free breakfast before."

"Fine…but there is one condition." She replied. "That you promise me you'll be here when I get back…That you won't run away again."

Marshall nodded. "I'll be here."

"Let's go." Stan guided her out when she still was reluctant to leave.

Marshall waited until they were half way down the garden path before turning and walking back to the couch, leaving Tia to close the door and follow him.

"Thanks…" She started when she entered the room. "For seeing me…"

"I just want to know the truth." He told her. "You owe me that."

"I know I do." She sat beside him and tried to take his hand but he pulled away.

"Taylor is she really….is she…?"

Tia nodded. "She is your daughter…"

He closed his eyes. "I don't understand…How? How is this even possible?"

"I found out I was pregnant after you had left." She informed him. "I didn't even realize until I was six months ago."

Even though Tia had moved out five months before he left Michigan they still saw each other a lot. They still tried to make their marriage work but it just didn't.

"You knew where I was…I knew how to get hold of me."

"I was selfish…I know that." She admitted. "I knew couldn't do it…that I wasn't ready to raise another child and I knew if you knew about her, then you would come back."

"Of course I would have…"

"I always intended on telling you, Marshall…I just wanted some time to work out what I wanted and what I needed." She told him. "Joanne offered to take care of Taylor and I don't know, it seemed like a good idea at the time…and I promise you, Taylor has had a great life…Joanne is a brilliant Mom."

"Is that meant to make me feel better?" He asked. "Just because you didn't want her, didn't give you the right to decide for me."

"I know…It just got harder and harder to undo as Taylor got older." She claimed. "I didn't want to hurt her and didn't want to drag you back into a life you didn't want."

"That I didn't want?" He repeated. "You left me, Tia…You walked out on me...I was dying in that apartment alone with the memories."

"You had already given so much up for me…"

"No!" He cut in sharply. "I did it for me… I wanted it. I wanted you and I wanted Emily…nothing else mattered."

"I'm sorry." She said helplessly.

"Yeah…" He leaned back against the couch.

Tia brushed away a few tears, taking a deep shaky breath before continuing. "I spoke with Jo-Anne…She said Mom told Taylor everything before she died."

Marshall stayed quiet; he really didn't know what to say but knew he wanted to know what was going on.

"She had always asked about who her Dad was…We told her the truth, that you didn't know about her but if you did, you would have be there..."

"Did she know who you were?"

She shook her head. "As far as she was concerned, Jo was her mom and her dad was some guy she had a relationship with."

"Some guy…" He repeated, mumbling to himself. "I bet Jo would have done anything to keep her away from me."

"That's not true." She shook her head. "I know she hasn't been your biggest fan but she knew you were a good Dad…She knew you would have been there in a heartbeat."

"So, it was just you that didn't want me there…"

"It wasn't like that." She insisted. "I know, I'm not explaining this very well but it was never really about you…It was about me… and about us….I couldn't handle it."

He still didn't understand…He still couldn't get his head around her wanting to keep this from him. He could admit, that they had been rushing things the past week but he had never doubt their feelings for each other. They would always have a special connection and he thought nothing would ever be able to break that…but this just might.

"Mom told Taylor all about you…What a kind, great guy you are." Tia continued softly. "She told her stories about you…and they were all true, Marshall…Taylor wanted to meet you…To get to know you…She wants her Dad."

This time when she covered his hand with hers, he was too deep in thought to notice.

"I guess, Mom had kept track of you since you left Michigan and told Taylor were to find you…I had been a little surprise when she was hell bent on coming to Albuquerque but I never thought she had this plan…" She told him. "It was just a coincidence that we ran into you at the restaurant…She was going to email you…Tell you who she was."

"I don't know if I can do this…." He whispered. "I don't think I can be who she wants me to be."

"She doesn't want you to be anyone other than who you are." She replied. "I know I screwed up…You have every right to never want to speak to me again but I do know you…I know you wouldn't Taylor to suffer just because of me."

"Maybe you knew me a long time ago but I guess this proves we've both changed…" He stood up.

"Marshall…"

"Maybe it's best if you just go." He said before leaving the room.

**XxXxX**

Stan forced Mary to eat her breakfast with him at the diner, giving Marshall more than 15 minutes and when she returned, she was relieved to see Marshall's truck still in the driveway. She found him sat on the kitchen floor, again and sighed. She placed the takeaway coffee and Danishes she had brought back for him on the counter. Despite him asking for her bring him some breakfast, she knew it was just a ploy to get her out the house but hoped later he would eat something.

"Again with the floor." She commented, dropping to her knees beside him. "You know, you have some perfectly good chairs just a few steps away."

"Seemed like the best place to be… My head is spinning…It would hurt if I fell off a chair." He mumbled.

"How did it go?" She asked gently, noticing that there was now an open box beside him and looked like photographs were inside.

"She tried to explain…Still can't really understand."

"I don't blame you." Mary answered. "It's a lot to get your head around."

He nodded but said no more.

"What's with the box?" She asked.

He looked at her for a few seconds, debating with himself whether he should tell her. He knew she would probably be upset or angry that he kept such a secret from her and didn't know if he could deal with that right now.

"Come on, it can't be that bad." She said lightly and was glad to see him reaching into the box, picking one picture and looking at it briefly before handing it to her.

Mary smiled a little, seeing Marshall who must have been only a teenager in the picture, holding a baby and looking a little nervous. "Who's the kid?"

"That's my daughter…" He said softly. "A few hours after she was born."

Mary head turned quickly to look at him. "Your daughter? But I thought you said you had never met Taylor before?"

He took the photo back, running his thumb over the image. "It's not Taylor…Her name is Emily."

"Emily?" Mary's eyes widened in surprise.

"Tia and I had only been together for six months when she fell pregnant… Two months later, we decided to elope." He told her, still not looking up from the picture. "Our families were not happy…but we were…we found a small apartment and although we had to scrimp and save to get by but we were happy."

"What happened?" She asked, knowing there was no way the man next to her would knowingly abandon his child…not like she had been.

"Emily was three…Tia and I were both just about to finish college…I managed to get a good job which paid well…things were starting to work out then…" he stopped for a minute, taking a deep breath. "Then one day, I got a phone saying there had been accident…She was gone before I got to the hospital."

Mary felt her heart threaten to split in two and tears fill her eyes. "Oh god..."

"A drunk driver lost control and mounted the sidewalk…She didn't stand a chance."

When she saw he was struggling to hold it together, Mary shuffled along the floor, closer to her partner. She pulled his head down to her shoulder and putting an arm across his stomach, holding him closer to her.

"I don't know what to say…" She told him. "I'm sorry."

"I couldn't tell you…" He whispered. "I couldn't talk about her…It just too much."

"It's okay." She assured him.

"I don't know what to do, Mare." She felt him lean a little more heavily on her. "Tia couldn't face being a mom again after Emily and although I know I should hate her for keeping this from me, maybe she was right….maybe it was for the best."

"I know you don't believe that." She replied. "I can't say I have any idea what you're feeling or what you've been through but I bet your little girl would want you to be happy…"

She frowned in surprise when he pulled away from her. "What?"

"Why do people always say that?" He asked. "Why do they assume that Emily would want me to carry on living?"

"Because she loved you." Mary reasoned.

"She was three years old, Mare! She rarely spent a few hours away from us…She was scared of the dark!" He told her before continuing more quietly. "She was scared of the dark and we had to put her into the ground…"

"Marshall, don't…" Mary choked back a sob of her own.

"She was three years old…I was her Dad…I'm meant to be there for her…to protect her…to hold when she's scared…"

"You can't think like that." She placed a hand on his cheek, turning his face so he was looking at him. "Please, tell me that you haven't been looking for a way out?"

He felt a wave of guilt and wanted to look away but couldn't.

"Tell me!" She said firmly. "Marshall!"

"Remember in the gas station…When I told you to leave?" He questioned. "I had given up…Had enough…I found my way out…found a way to get back to my heart…"

"No." She shook her head, not wanting to believe it. Never in a million years would she have believed that Marshall had those kinds of feelings.

"But I didn't…You told me not to die…and I didn't…I tried…For you." More tears appeared and this time he didn't try to stop them. "What kind of father does that make me?"

"Marshall…" She pulled him to her again, pretty much crawling onto his lap so she could get as close to him as possible. She wanted to thank him…wanted to tell him that she was gratefully that he had chosen her but it would just make her sound selfish. "I don't know the right words to say so just know I'm here…for whatever you need…I'm here."

He held onto her tightly and cried, almost silently. He had kept Emily in the deepest part of his heart but now he couldn't hide it anymore.

**TBC**

**So, a long, heavy and hopefully, an emotional chapter. I hope I managed to pull it off. Please review!**


	8. Chapter 8

**Thanks to everyone who reviewed the last chapter…Means a lot! **

**Enjoy! **

**Unplanned Life**

Mary had spent all day and night with Marshall, just talking. He had spoken a little about Emily, telling Mary what a sweet girl she had been. He told her about how before she was born, he had never really been around babies and had been scared that he would drop her or hurt her. He spoke about how difficult it had been to begin with, how little sleep they both got but eventually they worked out a routine. He told her about the winter he had slipped on some ice and ended up with a broken arm and a concussion. Emily had been 2 and half at the time and wanted to look after him. That was the first time she had told him she wanted to be a doctor.

Then when Mary had brought up Taylor, Marshall had shut down. Not wanting to talk anymore about anything.

When morning arrived, Mary told him she needed to go to the office for a few hours but they had made lunch plans. She didn't want to leave him but knew that he needed a bit of time of his own. He needed to remember Emily and what it was like being a father again.

She needed to some time to get her head around everything as well. This was a side of Marshall she didn't know existed but when she really thought about it, a few things now made sense. She also wanted to talk to Stan and see if she could get some time off as well. She understood that Marshall would need to talk to someone professionally and now she knew about Emily, she actually agreed but she wanted to be there for him too, for whatever he needed.

"Mary?" Stan looked surprised when she entered the office. "You told me you were taking today off."

"Yeah, I just wanted to come in for a few hours to get a few things caught up." She replied. "And I actually wanted to talk to you about taking longer off."

"How much longer?"

"I don't know…about a few weeks or so." She answered. "I just….I just don't think Marshall should be alone right now…"

Stan frowned. "You think it's that serious?"

Mary sighed, looking past Stan to Eleanor who was listening with concern but no one else had arrived yet. She had mentioned talking to Stan about everything and Marshall claimed he didn't care if their boss found out.

"Can I ask you something?"

"Sure…"

"Whenever we get a case involving children…Why do you always give it to me?" She asked. "I mean, Marshall is great with kids…and I'm not so why me?"

"Oh…" Stan thought about it for a few seconds. "Well, I don't know…I think, there was something said when he first interviewed for the position…I guess, it just stuck."

"He said that he didn't want to work on cases that involved children?" Eleanor walked over to join them.

"No just that he would prefer not to take the lead." Stan replied. "I never really gave it much thought…"

"Why would he request that?" Eleanor asked.

"Because of this." Mary handed over a photo of Emily. She didn't know why she had put the picture into her pocket but there was something about it. Marshall had told her it had been taken on her third birthday, a few weeks before the accident and she had been grinning at the camera, chocolate cake smeared on her face. Despite the blonde hair and brown eyes, which she must have got from her mother, all Mary could see was Marshall.

"Oh would you look at that…" Eleanor couldn't help but smile. "Is this Taylor?"

"This is Emily."

"Who's Emily?" Stan asked.

"Marshall's daughter."

"What?" His head snapped up from the photo to look at her.

"There's another one?"

"Kinda…"

"Kinda? What does that mean?"

"She died…" Mary took back the photo, giving it one more look before continued. "A drunk drive hit her… She was just three years old."

"You're kidding me?" Stan stared at her. "Mary, are you serious?"

"He told me yesterday…" She answered. "You didn't know?"

"What? No! Of course not!"

"He was just 22 years old, Stan…" Mary leaned back against a desk and ran a hand down her face. "She would be 19…At college…Hell, she may even have her own kid…"

"Where's Marshall now?" Stan asked.

"At his house…He didn't get much sleep last night so was going to try and get a couple of hours." Mary replied. "We're going to meet for lunch."

"This is just unbelievable…" Stan said.

"I know but am I crazy or do some things make sense now?" Mary asked.

"Like what?"

"Like Norman Baker…How Marshall was the one that insisted Norman wouldn't have committed suicide because things didn't add up…then when we were on that bridge…he just accepted it…He understood." Mary remembered. "And when Warren Morris considered giving up his family for his old life…Marshall flipped…stormed out the apartment and slammed the door…"

At the time, she remembered thinking her partner was acting out of character but was actually impressed with his action. Warren needed a wakeup call and it was nice to see Marshall being the bad cop for once.

"He pulled all those strings to get that door that had their heights recorded on…" Stan sighed.

"I called him a dork for being so sentimental." Mary paced around a little bit. "Then there was the time…."

"The time…?" Stan prompted when she trailed off but she was too deep in thought that she didn't hear him. "Mary? What is it?"

"What?" She looked at him.

"What did you think of?" Stan asked.

"Nothing…nothing…" She shook her head.

"Mary?"

"He even said when he was shot he was okay with dying because it was his way out." Mary decided to move on. "That's why he managed to get back up after being hit and why he kept telling me to leave him."

"I should have seen something…I should have noticed." He rubbed his forehead.

"We all missed it." Mary replied. "I'm his best friend…I spend all day with him."

"How is he doing now?" Eleanor questioned.

"I don't know…" She threw her hands up. "I don't know how to deal with this? What do I do?"

"Hell if I know…" Stan sighed.

"You just wait." Eleanor advised. "Unfortunately, this isn't something that you can fix…Marshall needs to work through this himself and at some point he may need your help."

"How do you get over something like this?" Mary asked.

"I don't think you ever do…" Eleanor moved back towards her desk. "But you learn to live with it."

Mary was quite for a few minutes, thinking about what she said. Out of the three of them, Eleanor had the most experience in this sort of thing and what she said made sense, no matter how much she hated it.

"Mary?" Stan placed a hand on her arm to get her attention.

"I don't like this…" She whispered. "I want to fix this for him."

Stan smiled a little. "I know you do…"

_**XxXxX**_

Marshall hesitated on Mary's porch; not wanting to face any of her family and now was regretting agreeing to pick her up for lunch. He was about to return to his car and just call her cell when the door opened.

"I thought I heard you pull up." Mary grabbed his sleeve and pulled him into the house. "Come in, I won't be a minute…"

"Fine…" He sighed, shrugging her off and following her to the kitchen.

"Did you get some sleep?" She asked, moving around the kitchen.

"A little…" He frowned. "What are you doing? Packing a picnic?"

"We're eating lunch on the road."

"What?"

"We're going on a road trip." She added some sodas to the bag.

"You're leaving?" Raph asked from the doorway causing them both to turn around.

"For a few days…" Mary answered and opened the fridge.

"Mary, we need to talk!" Raph entered the room fully.

"Look, don't worry about it…I'm just going to go home…" Marshall cut in. "Mare, I appreciate it but I'm not really up for…"

"We're going." She looked at him pointedly.

"What's going on?" Brandi joined them. "What's with the shouting?"

"There's no shouting." Mary rolled her eyes, throwing a handle of candy bars in with the sodas.

"Mary's leaving for a nice weekend away with her partner." Raph said bitterly and Marshall sighed, leaning against the wall and ran a hand over his eyes.

"Jesus, Raph!" Mary spun around again to face him. "Let it go!"

"Let it go?!"

"If you can't handle this then we're done here." She snapped. "I'm sick of you trying to make me feel guilty for having a friend…"

"I really should just go…" Marshall tried to back out of the room but Mary grabbed his arm again.

"No."

"Mary…"

"We're going, Marshall!"

"Going where?"

"Michigan."

Marshall stepped back quickly, forcing his arm out of her grip. "No."

"Marshall…"

"No." He shook his head. "This has nothing to do with you…You don't get to do decided if I go back there."

"I do."

"How do you figure that?" he glared at her.

"Because I was the one that cried in your arms after finding out my Dad went out and get a new family."

Marshall stared at her in surprise, not expecting to hear that.

"Do you remember what you said to me that day?" She asked but didn't wait for him to answer. "You said that if he was still out there somewhere that you couldn't believe he would want his daughter to suffer the way I was suffering…"

"Mary…"

"But you know what, Marshall? He's not here…He never came back…And I doubt he'll ever will." She continued. "I know when we were stood on that balcony you wanted to help me but now I also know you were thinking about Emily…."

"Don't…" He told her, warningly.

"My Dad is out there somewhere, living his life without us and then there is you…I know that you would move heaven and earth for your kids….You're willing to die for them." She reached out again, taking his hand and squeezing it gently. "Remember you asked me if the reason I had never searched for my Dad was because I was scared about what I would find?"

Marshall looked down at their hands and nodded a little.

"You were right…I was scared but you know what? Taylor wasn't." She pointed out. "She came and found you…She wants you to be her Dad and I understand that you're scared and surprised and you need to get your head around it but I also know that the longer you leave it, the more you'll regret later."

She watched him, waiting to see if he would reply but realized he was struggling to hold on to his emotions.

"I've already cleared everything with Stan." She added. "So, it's either Michigan or we both spend our vacation time stuck here….Your choice."

He looked up, swallowing a lump that had risen in his throat. "Michigan."

She smiled, already knowing what he would choose. "Go out to the car…I'll just grab my bag and be right out."

He nodded and turned to leave; making sure to avoid eye contact with Brandi and Raph as he did.

Mary waited until she heard the door before looking to her fiancée. "Raph…I'm not going to ask you to wait around…

"Wait around for what?"

"The talk." She sighed. "Look, I'm asking a lot…I know that it's pretty selfish of me to want you to understand and I really don't know if our relationship is strong for all this drama…"

"Mary, don't do this…"

"I need to focus on Marshall right now…I need to do this." She stated. "I can't tell you when I'll be home and what will happen when I am…So, I won't blame you if you're not here when I get back."

"Mary, wait…" Raph watched her grabbed the bag off the counter.

She paused and kissed his cheek before walking towards the door.

"Are you okay?" Brandi asked him.

"No."

"Look, they have a tight friendship….they've been in situations that we could probably never understand…bonds form in that kinda of thing…"

"Did you hear what she said? That she cried in his arms...Have you ever seen Mary cry at all?"

Brandi opened her mouth to reply but managed to stop herself at the last second. Her mind automatically went to when Marshall had been shot and how Mary had collapsed into Jinx's arms at the hospital…She had later blamed it on an adrenaline crash but Brandi had never forgotten that night…She had never seen her sister in such a bad way before.

"What are you going to do?" She asked, chewing her bottom lips.

Raph shrugged. "I have no idea…"

**TBC**

**ROAD TRIP! Please review and let me know what you think!**


	9. Chapter 9

**Hey, thank you so much for the reviews. It seems like ages since I updated this fic…seems like ages sine I updated any In Plain Sight stories. Sorry about that. I have been working on some new ones but resisting the urge to post them while I have so many unfinished! Please keep the feedback coming! **

**Enjoy!**

**Unplanned Life**

The first hour of the drive to Michigan was in silence; Marshall had insisted on taking the first shift for driving and Mary was actually thankful as it gave her chance to think. She thought about Marshall and his children…and the fact that he had children. It was hard to image what would happen next. She knew that despite what Marshall had said so far, Taylor would become his number one priority and that how it should be but she just didn't know where that left her and as well as his life in Albuquerque. Her thoughts then went to her relationship with Raphael and wondered whether she would even have a life in Albuquerque after this road trip with over. She was pretty sure Raph would not be around when she got back and she wasn't sure how she felt about that and she didn't know whether she would want to be there if Marshall wasn't.

"Do you want to talk about it?" Marshall was the one to break the silence an hour and a half into the journey.

"It?" Mary questioned, looking across at him.

"What happened back at the house…" Marshall took his eyes off the road briefly. "With Raphael?"

"No, I don't want to talk about it." Mary answered, turning her gaze to the scene rushing by through the window.

"He seemed pretty upset that you were going away…" Marshall continued anyway. "With me."

Mary sighed. "It's not important…I'll deal with it when I get back."

"If it involves me…If you coming with me…"

"Don't even think about telling me that I shouldn't be here." She turned to look at him again quickly. "I'm your friend….Your partner and if Raph cannot accept me being there for you when you need me, our future together don't look very good."

"That's it? He thinks that we're spending too much time together?" Marshall questioned. "He's jealous?"

"He doesn't understand us….our friendship." Mary said quietly. "He wanted to come with me to help find you the other night…Can you imagine what would have happened if he did?"

"Mare, I like Raph…He's a good guy…." Marshall started.

"But he doesn't get to be a part of us." She said firmly.

"Mare…"

"What?"

"You're marrying him."

"I don't think I am anymore…"

"He thinks there is something going on between us?"

"No, I think he trusts that I've been faithful…"

"But?" He prompted.

"But he knows there is more to us…" She admitted. "That I'm closer to you then I am to him…then I could ever be."

Marshall sighed. "And how do you feel about that?"

"What?"

"I mean, do you want to change that…do you want me to back off?"

"God no." she turned to look at him quickly. "I don't want that."

"What do you want?" He asked, glancing across to her again.

She sighed loudly. "All I know is that I want to be here for you and that's my number one priority at the moment."

She watched him for a few seconds, knowing he was surprised by her declaration. She had no that doubt that he knew that she cared for him and would do anything for him but she knew he must be shocked to hear her saying it out loud. After a few seconds in silence, she turned back to looking out of the passenger window. She frowned when she realized he was pulling off the freeway too early.

"Marshall?" She questioned. "What are you doing?"

"We need to talk properly." He claimed. "And we can't do that while in a moving car."

It was another five minutes before Marshall found somewhere secluded to park up, giving Mary's mind chance to come up with all kind of reason to what he wanted to talk about.

Once he had turned off the engine, he unbuckled his seat belt and turned so he was fully facing her.

"I can't let you put me first." He told her. "I won't let you."

"You won't let me?" She repeated and he winced a little at the tone. "Oh, silly old me, thinking I just may have a say in it…"

"Mare…"

"Why is it that I let you have a say in my life but when it comes to you, you always push me away…always assume that I wouldn't want to help?" She questioned. "Or is it that you don't trust me enough…"

"Please, don't think that." He cut in. "I just don't want you giving up anything for me…"

"You know, everyone thinks it's me that is closed off…that I'm the one that doesn't let anyone in but they don't see you…the real you." Mary continued, only realizing how true it was as she was saying the words. "No one realizes that you hide behind questions and trivia and you never give anything away…"

"Do we have to go through this?" He ran a hand through his hair.

"Yes because I'm scared, Marshall…"

"Of what?" He looked up in concern.

"That I'm like them…That I don't know you at all."

"I'm me, Mare…I'm your best friend." He assured her. "I know, I'm not always open with what's going on with me but that's because I want to protect you and our friendship, I don't want to be become an obligation…someone else you need to fix."

"Marshall…" She reached out and gripped onto his forearm. "It's not like that with you…I wouldn't be doing it because I felt like I had to but because I want to…Because I want to help you…because you would do it…have done it for me."

"And what about Raph?" He asked. "Our friendship obviously is a problem for the two of you…I don't want to be the cause of any trouble."

"I can't lose you, Marshall…Do you understand?" She made sure to keep eye contact as she spoke. "I do not want for you to back off or for our friendship to suffer… I am more than willing to let Raph leave if he doesn't like it…Doesn't that tell you something?"

After a few seconds of staring back at her, he couldn't take it and was the one that looked away first.

"I'm messed up, Mare." He whispered. "You don't need any more unnecessary drama in your life.

"Hey." She took hold of his chin, lifting it so he looking at her again. "You're not unnecessary drama and you can't get rid of me that easily, okay?"

"Mare…"

"You've been through a lot, it's understandable if you're a little bit messed up but so am I." She told him. "It's why we're so good for each other…"

"But is it healthy?" He questioned.

"Who the hell cares? It's working." She stated. "We'll deal with all that later…When we get back to Albuquerque."

"But…"

"Marshall, just stop." She cut in. "Just stop thinking about me and everything else….concentrate on you and on Emily and Taylor…. Be selfish for once."

"What you don't realize is that I have been selfish…all these years, I've just ran away from everyone and everything...Only telling people what I wanted and letting them believe I was a different person."

"While that might be true in some ways, there is one thing you missed out…"

"What?" He frowned.

"You never ran from me." She pointed out. "And you may not have told me the entire truth but have you ever lied to me?"

"Never." He replied without hesitation.

"Maybe if I was the kind of person who was used to having a best friend, then I may have realized you were holding something back but now that I do know, I'm here for you…no matter what."

"I wanted to tell you but I just couldn't work out how…" He admitted. "And I tried to leave because of how much I wanted to tell you everything but I just couldn't let you go…"

"Well, we have a lot to discuss later but right now you and Taylor are what are important." Mary stated.

"Yeah…" He swallowed nervously. "What the hell am I meant to do, Mare?"

"About what? About Taylor?"

"She's almost 16 years old and has had all these years without me around…"

"Well, you have a lot of catching up to do then." Mary cut in. "You cannot feel guilt about not being there, Marshall…You didn't know and from what happened so far, Taylor doesn't hold any bad feelings towards you either…She just wants to get to know you."

"What if I'm not good enough for her?" He asked quietly. "What if I don't live up to her dreams?"

"Trust me, Marshall…You're good enough." She said softly. "Everything will all work out…You'll see."

"I hope you're right…" He sucked in a shaky breath. "Because I cannot go through losing another child…"

Mary reached over and squeezed his hand. "What are we doing sitting by the side of the road then? Let go find your daughter."

Marshall smiled a little, squeezing her hand back before bring it to his lips and kissing it gently. "Thanks, Mare…"

"It's what I'm here for…" She returned the smile. "Come on…let's go."

_**XxXxX**_

The rest of the day passed without much talking, both of them having a lot to think about. They stopped for the night but both of them just wanted to crash as soon as they found a hotel.

The next morning, Mary decided to drive, noticing how anxious her partner was getting the closer they got.

"Take the next left…" Marshall broke the silence when they were about 30 minutes away from their destination.

"The GPS says to keep going straight…" Mary glanced at it to see if she had missed something.

"Just turn left." Marshall reached over and shut the GPS off.

Mary shot him a look but could see he was tenser then before and his hands were clenched tightly together so decided to just do as he asked.

He told her when to turn again and that is when Mary saw the grave yard come into view. The parking lot was pretty empty and once she cut the engine, she just sat there silently, waiting to see what Marshall did.

It was almost five minutes before she heard him take a deep breath and unsnapped his belt then opened the car door.

She debated with herself if she should stay where she was or if she should follow him. She watched him opening the trunk and heard him searching through his bag. She waited until he closed the trunk again and entered the grave yard through the gate before getting out the car herself.

She slowly followed him, hanging back a little to give him some time alone but stayed close enough to watch him. He stopped in front of a headstone that had some fresh, colorful flowers already in front of it. She leaned back against the gate, with her arms folded as Marshall slowly knelled down on the grass, reaching out to trace each of the letters on the stone. He then placed a small stuffed teddy bear beside the flowers before hanging his head downwards and Mary could see his fists clenching the grass tightly.

Forcing herself forward, she joined him and silently placed a supportive hand on his shoulder. He lifted his head again but was looking at the headstone and she could see tears in his eyes.

"Tell me more about her." Mary said softly, lowering herself to the ground to sit cross legged beside him.

"She was a good girl…smart…" He whispered. "Had a great imagination…loved listening to stories…."

Mary smiled a little and when he moved to sat cross legged too, she took hold of his hand tightly.

"It always took me longer to put her to bed because we would make up stories...We would always end up laughing…."

She shifted closer to him, leaning her head against his shoulder and just let him talk….

**TBC**

**Please review!**


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